Up until recentley I have been completley in the closet and in denial regarding my sexuality. I have found a great guy on another site and we have been chatting on MSN for the last cople of weeks, we have so much in common (family values, future ambitions wants needs etc.) I fel that he is the one for me and makes me feel complete. He is acceptant of the fact that I am in the closet still, I have even begun thinking and planning on how to start the process of coming out so that we may start a regular relationship. Ok now here is the part that is bothering me. We live 2 hous away (but are both comforable with a long distance relationship and plan on moving closer if things work out) So we were planning on starting to talk on the phone soon, we talked on msn every night for hours until last friday. I came home from work and as usual went right online to see him but he wasnt there so I waited and waited until he came on. He said that he couldnt talk that night because he had someone there who didnt know he was gay but he had something he wanted to talk to me about and thought it was best to do over the phone then immediatley went offline. So on saturday I waited by the computer all afternoon until he came on that night, he said he couldnt talk because he had to go to bed to get up early in the morning (which is today) Now today he hasnt been online at all, he signed onto msn once but immediatley signed back off without any contact. I am so worried now that he doesnt want to continue with me because I am not out or something. I realy have strong feelings for him and want so badly for things to work out. Do you think I am just being over paranoied or is there something to worry about here?? :bang::bang::bang::tears::tears::tears:
I dont think you should start worrying. This all happened within a period of a couple days right? Give it time. Chances are he really is busy. Give it a couple more days maybe even a week. If this continues and you honestly think hes trying to ignore you or avoid you then confront him about it. Either send him an E-mail or something expressing your feelings and concerns or arranging for a personal meeting when you can talk about it then. Then you can ask him if anythings up and how he feels about the relationship, were you stand in his lfe, etc. Basically just calm down, be patient, and dont worry. Its a little too soon to be frantic.(*hug*)
Thanks for the support and advice, I am still anxious and nervous but things will work out I am sure. Love makes things so confuzing! (&&&)
Just shoot him an e-mail. "Missed you this weekend. Hope everything's OK." Then go live your life until he gets back to you. Lex
As Lex says - I had a similar experience a few weeks ago, it turned out the guy had an old friend coming to visit him unexpectedly. He got upset when I stayed offline for a couple of days because of work pressures... Relax.
It's probably a little premature to be making future plans with someone that you've only chatted on MSN with. As Lex says, write him an email, and then forget about him. Don't sit at the computer all day waiting for him to sign in. If he's serious, he'll email you back. If he isn't, better to find out now rather than after another 2 weeks - or longer.
Thanks for the support guys. I just spoke to him on MSN and he said he was being didtant because he was not sure of his feelings. He said that he had been looking at other guys (not in a sexual way or seeking them out but just in passing) and was not sure of his feelings. He said that he shouldnt have these feelings if we were to make things work. He said he was feeling guilty for haiving these thoughts while we were starting out. We talked for about an hour and agreed to take things slowly to make them work. Tomorrow we are going to talk on the phone for the first time. I am so nervous and anxious and realy want things to work more than ever before.
