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I am in the closet, in love with my straight best friend, and am getting hit on

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by codyphoto, Apr 6, 2015.

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  1. codyphoto

    codyphoto
    Regular Member

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    Location:
    Boston
    Gender:
    Male
    Out Status:
    Not out at all
    For anyone that's read my last post, you already know that I am madly in love with my best friend (if you don't believe me, go to my profile and see for yourself).

    However, there's another dilemma that I'm confronted with now: a girl I met at a conference asked for my number, and since that was the first time any girl had asked for my number, I gave her mine, and now we're texting. But, I'm in love with my best friend, so I don't think I'm going to date her.

    Here's where the dilemma comes in.

    She wants me to be her boyfriend (aka I think she likes me because she basically said she did), but I'm in love with my best friend more than anything in the world, more than life itself. So, I don't know if I should try dating her, thus risking that my best friend will think I'm straight and never even consider dating me, possibly opening the door for him to get his own girlfriend. She really wants me to call her and text her all the time, but I'm so nervous that this is going to go too far and I won't be able to let him know that I really love him instead, so I desperately need advice.

    Thank you all so much!! :slight_smile:
     
    #1 codyphoto, Apr 6, 2015
  2. Noodle72

    Noodle72
    Full Member

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    Location:
    Canada
    Gender:
    Male (trans*)
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Bisexual
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    Maybe tell the girl that you want to stay friends with her. You don't have to tell her about your feelings for your best friend, but if you don't want to be with her then see if she still wants to be friends with you. Hope this helps, I've never been in a relationship but I hope my inexperience can be helpful in any way possible. :stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes:
     
    #2 Noodle72, Apr 6, 2015
  3. YermanTom

    YermanTom
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    Location:
    Co Wicklow Ireland
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    I don't think either relationship is going to go anywhere. Your friend is straight and the girl thinks that you are straight. It's a question of how to let the girl know you like her as a friend and nothing more, without hurting her.
     
    #3 YermanTom, Apr 6, 2015
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