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I want to tell my dad...

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by BeautifulStranger, Nov 20, 2008.

  1. BeautifulStranger

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    ... about Mike.

    He already knows I'm gay.
    I'm sure many of you have heard the infamous 'buying condoms with my boyfriend' story, so coming out isn't the issue.

    Mike doesn't get along with his family for many reasons, and so I offered for him to spend his holidays with my family once I'm home from Germany.
    I really want to tell my dad about Mike because Mike is someone special to me. In fact, he is the most special person to me and, as mentioned before, we want to marry when it's legal.
    Yes, I know I'm 16... but spare me the lecture. I've enough experience to know what love feels like and what it doesn't.

    I'm worried that my dad won't be cool with it. But at the same time, I think my dad already knows on some level.
    Countless times I've cried over Mike and when asked, I'd say something like "He's just a good friend of mine. I've never connected with anyone like this before." It's quite obvious to anyone that Mike and I are more than friends.

    What if I tell him and he forbids Mike from seeing me or me from seeing Mike?

    The time right now feels so right to tell him. I even sent him a text message telling him we need to talk. But with the holidays coming up, I don't want to upset him. And most of all, I don't want to tell him if he's going to tell my mother.
    I know, without a doubt, she would NOT be okay with me being around Mike or Mike being around me.
     
  2. JT

    JT
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    What do your worries stem from? Your out status claims dad accepts. Why would he deny you of this aspect of your life?
     
  3. BeautifulStranger

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    I use 'accepts' very loosely
    My dad accepts as much as he possibly can for a white-collared, hard-working republican who is a major part of society in Alpena.

    He may accept that I'm gay.
    But he may not accept that I have a boyfriend.
     
  4. Nova713

    Nova713 Guest

    The best you can do is to talk it out with your dad. Be honest. It's the only way you will know for sure. If you and your boyfriend just show up, then it may cause problems especially during the holidays when emotions are already running high.

    I can't say that I know exactly where you're coming from. When I came out to my parents, they explicitly forbid me to bring a guy home. That might change with time. Best of Luck to you.
     
  5. dudethere

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    but being gay is about having BFs i say go for it and good luck with ur marrage :grin:
     
  6. Mickey

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    Hopefully,you can talk to him. I mean, he can't expect you to never be with someone.
    Just be honest on your feelings. That's all you can do.
    I certainly wish you the best. I hope it all goes in your favor.
     
  7. BeautifulStranger

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    So I told him

    And I'm more than pleased with the results.

    He affirmed my suspicions that he had already known about Mike and I. He said the things that I didn't like, such as 'I can't be excited for you' or 'This isn't what a father likes to here'.

    But then he said the things that matter like, 'You are my son. That will never change. I will always love you'.

    And, because I was so surprised, I got bold and mentioned Prom saying 'If he and I are still together, I will want a date. Not a friend... but a date'. My dad didn't shoot down the request. So there's hope afterall.
     
  8. EM68

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    That's great to hear! :thumbsup:
     
  9. Nova713

    Nova713 Guest

    That's awesome. I'm very happy for you. :icon_bigg