Struggling to come out to my cousin. She will be the 1st person I tell. Advice???

The only mind set you need is to be completely confident in yourself. That doesn't mean you have to be sure of your sexuality, just confident and proud to be yourself. When I came out to some of my close friends I just told them "I like chicks, so yeah." as if it wasn't something very new or shocking to me and they took it well. As long as you know that your cousin will be accepting or at least understanding, then you can come out to her.

 

I totally understand where you're coming from in saying that it's like a rollercoaster. I've explained it that EXACT same way before. It gets annoying; it's like your brain just taunts you with making you feel ready to blurt it out one day and terrified the next. I came out to my first person when I was having one of those idgaf days and I did regret it for a short time after. I guess I wouldn't really call it regret. I just felt extremely awkward around her even though she was 100% supportive. I've been out to her for 6 months now and it's still something we don't really talk about face to face (just texting etc). Anyways, I can't really offer you any advice since I'm in the same boat, but hopefully knowing you're not alone on that rollercoaster helps.

 

Here is how I came out to my mom: I started a conversation that was pretty normal but connects with my being gay. In my case, it was about the social environment at my old school and how it compared to that of my new school. (People at my old school already treated me differently because I didn't force myself to be exactly like everyone else. Being perceived as gay made it worse.) Then I slowly got more specific until eventually I had backed myself into a corner. I reached a point where I told myself, "I can't wimp out now." And then I had an impulsive moment and told her. Maybe you could try something like that. Good luck.

 

When I came out to my parents, I felt the exact same way - confident one day and then the next terrified. The thing that changed was that I just grew more confident in myself and in who I was, and said to myself, right, tomorrow I'm going to just suck it up and tell them, no matter what because I'm tired of hiding. I started with the typical "Can I talk to you about something quite personal?" and then just went from there! Everyone's different though, some people prefer the blunt and to the point "I'm gay" but others prefer the whole making sure the person they're coming out to understands it's important and maybe hard to say.

Good luck! I hope everything goes well for you!

 

First couple people I made this elaborate plan in my head of how I should do it. In the end I just had my heart pounding and all I could really do is blurt it out.

So unless you think you're going to be cool with it I suggest to keep it short. Indicate you got something serious to tell them, and go for it and say ""I like guys" or "I'm bisexual" or "I'm gay" or... you get the point.

After that just try to answer their questions if they have them. If you don't know just say that.

If however your not freaking out right then maybe you can actually do the thought out way...

 

As was mentioned above I backed myself into a corner in the conversation. I knew I wanted to go through with it and, whether or not I actually believed it, I knew the person in question would be understanding and supportive. I wish I could tell you how I got myself into the corner but I don't remember. I think a lot of it was not conscious effort. Going to visit her from that far away may help if she is wondering why you went. Good luck and I'm sure you can do it.