One reason I have yet to come out is that I hate awkward conversations/situations. Telling someone your sexual orientation seems like such an awkward thing to discuss with people. If you would be kind enough to answer, I have 2 questions: 1. Was coming out more or less awkward than you expected? 2. Who did you find it most awkward to come out to (dad, sister, best-friend etc.)? Thanks
I can relate. I am awkward at the best of times, so these conversations were definitely uncomfortable. But, most of my friends made it less awkward by being warm and accepting. I've not come out to family members so I can't really speak to that. I did feel like it would be more awkward than it was, but yes, it was indeed still pretty awkward, especially considering how nervous I was and how long I procrastinated before getting to my point and telling them. My therapist basically told me that coming out is going to be awkward and you just have to accept that and learn to be ok with the awkwardness. It does pass, and I will say that after you come out to someone there is a HUGE weight lifted, and you may even feel on top of the world for awhile. The way I see it is this: You can get through an awkward 15 minutes and have the conversation, or you can continue to live for months or years in the stagnant stress of staying in the closet. In my case, I'd choose the former. :icon_wink
I told a few people, my dad was curious as in the past, as far as he is aware I have never been into men, he is happy with it, but thinks its just a "phase". College friends are mature enough to not mind and don't find it unusual or anything, in fact I doubt they care about it that much. One old school friend I told said: your sexuality is none of my business, but didn't have a problem with it. I know it is hard, but I think you will find that coming out and accepting it, is better than just lying to people or not telling them, and if friends have a problem, well, I wouldn't want to be friend with them anyway
With the people I'm out to (lost count but I'm guessing it's around 20), it wasn't awkward because I always arranged for it not to be. I'm naturally shy and awkward and don't want to make coming out these long and painful moments so instead of telling people, I'd just be myself until they asked -- or assumed. Commenting on girls, mentioning LGBT-themed movies and issues (transphobia, marriage, etc), talking about the LGBT group meetings I go to on campus. Or saying something about "my girlfriend." I came out to my roommate by kissing the girl I like in front of her. It's worked well for me, actually. The only time I had to make an announcement out of it and actually say, "I have something to tell you" was with my best friend -- who, being my best friend, was absolutely awesome about it. I've been lucky, sure, but I just wanted to say that coming out isn't always going to be awful and awkward. That said, my most awkward coming out was probably to my mom -- because she didn't believe me at first, and once she did, she didn't take it well.
I had a hard time coming out to my Dad because I never knew his views, but he turned out to be loving and supportive after all. It wasn't too bad to come out to everyone, but people still have heterosexist beliefs so at the same time it feels meaningless too.
It was strange. I live in a very homophobic country, but have a understanding mother. Sometimes I can't believe, how easy it was... But maybe, some people still thinks that "it's just a phase i'm going through".
Coming out to my Best Friend was weird because she though i was messing around with her but now she understands my way of life
