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Strange

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by Starshine16, Nov 24, 2008.

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  1. Starshine16

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    I came out to my best friend several weeks ago and she sounded so accepting and supportive and loving when I first told her,but now whenever I bring up any one of my lesbian,gay or bisexual friends or this girl that I really like,she goes slient and changes the subject almost immediately.I am hoping that I didn't make a mistake telling her first.I understand that she may need time to process it,but I hate that I changed our friendship so much to where she feels awkward talking to me.

    So do I leave her alone to let her process it or do I ask why she is so awkward around me now?
     
  2. musican

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    How long ago did you tell her? It could be that she needs more time to get used to the idea. Some people are ok with homosexuality but are just uncomfortable when people express their attraction to someone of the same sex. It could be that she isn't sure how to respond because she is straight and doesn't think that girls are attractive so seh can't agree or disagree and talk about it; I think that the main reason my best friend and I can talk about guys I think are cute is because she is straight and she thinks a lot of the guys that I find attractive are attractive too. Another possibility is that your friend realizes that you like girls and is uncomfortable because she wonders if you will start crushing on her.
     
  3. riddlerno1

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    i told 5 close female friends over the course of the last few weeks and i can see how they are all reacting to it positively but to varying degrees. One of the girls always sorta nods and smiles and says thats fantastic but nothing more. The others will actually bring it up as a topic and i dont mind talking about it now so thats fine. But i guess what im trying to say is taht everyone will react to the news in different levels even if they are happy with the news. Just wait and see how it pans out.
     
  4. Trystan

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    don't worry too much. If she feels uncomfortable about it, maybe try and discuss the being uncomfortable, just to clear the air and get it sorted out. She may have other related or unrelated problems, and it could be necessary just to confirm to her that to you, however you feel, it won't change your friendship. She may feel emotionally threatened that you will find another girl to be with all the time, or as the musician says, you might start crushing on her, so she is completely avoiding the subject.

    Hope it goes well and you can successfully salvage your current relationship (*hug*)
    hope that helped a bit
     
  5. Mikeyy

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    She's just getting used to the idea. I'd probably be a little more reserved when talking about relationships for the moment as it's making her uncomfortable. But hopefully, time will get her used to the idea.
     
  6. Lexington

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    She may simply not be comfortable (yet) talking about it. That doesn't mean she doesn't accept you. She just might not know what to say. So don't press the issue. Keep talking about other things. She'll probably ease up on it.

    Lex
     
  7. poetofdarkness

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    just talk to her and explain that it doesn't change your friendship whatsoever and askher why she doesn't like talking about it.
     
  8. BradThePug

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    This is an old thread. Please remember to check dates before you post.
     
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