So I came out to my mom and sister about me being gay, and in general I don't think they took it too well in a sense that it was too sudden for them. I gave them an idea that I was gay back in October but apparently they just thought I was confused. They aren't as open minded as I thought, and my mom thinks it's a stage which still upsets me. I wanted to let them know I was gay and leave it at that, but it ended up turning into a heated discussion where they think I don't know where I'm getting my information. They think my depression and anxiety is screwing with my mind, but I disagree immediately. So how do I go about this?
Give them time to think about it and let it sink in. Ill'd say probably after about a week or two maybe have a talk with them. Tell them how you're feeling and why your certain that your gay.
Your identity is valid, they should respect that. If they don't understand that, maybe you could send them an informational LGBT video or article to explain the validity of sexual oriebtation and identity and that it is not an illness and it is not a result of anxiety/depression. It's just love, and it's great
I agree with emma7, give them some time, so they can process the news. You don't need to talk about this again if you don't want to. You already came out, so you aren't hiding anything.
Remember the stages of loss anyone goes through when processing loss: denial-anger-bargaining-grief-acceptance. It took you some time to figure out where you are, it's going to take them a bit of time to understand and accept as well. I think if you just give it some time, they'll come around.
Like others have said, I think that it is best to give them time. When I first told my mum she didn't really know what to say and avoided the subject but it has been a year since I told her and a couple of days ago my sister said "that guy is so hot" and my mum turned right to me and said "do you think he is hot? I don't " lol. I answered normally as I would but it was nice and it made me smile, my sister even mentioned that she said that. All in all, what I am trying to say is that these things take time. Just let them know that this is who you are and that you aren't going to change, they will eventually accept it and it won't even be a thing anymore. It might be hard in the beginning but hopefully it all works out for you man.
You may want to direct them to the PFLAG website, there is a ton of stuff they can learn from this organization. As others have said above, let them grieve the person they thought you were, but also let them know the person that you actually are.
They have it backwards. First of all, do not let their current inability to accept your true self hurt your feelings. You have to understand that before you told them, they had a false idea of you in their minds, they incorrectly labeled you. Now, you reveal what their mind thought was you was only an illusion, and it's hard for them to accept that things are different. When in reality they aren't different, they just know more than they used to. If they love you, in time, when they find the ability to accept it, they'll come around to being okay with you being yourself. But if they don't (though I'm confident they will), you just have to accept that some people's minds are too narrow to see beyond their own perspectives (currently, but everyone has the potential to expand their awareness and open their minds, they just have to want to). At the end of the day, you need to remember, that somewhere, in the 7,000,000,000 people who inhabit this planet, are people who understand you, and are willing to love you as you are, unconditionally. Never give into the negativity. Express your true self happily, and the right people will find their way to you. You just have to have faith.
I hope they accept you for who you are, because after all, she raised you from birth and to be non-supportive at this point in time is simply ludicrous. I wish you well, my friend.
UniversalLover has it in a nutshell. The first sentence summing it all up "First of all, do not let their current inability to accept your true self hurt your feelings". You have obviously explored your feelings for some significant time. These things do take time, and people accept, either of themselves or their loved ones at different rates. My bisexuality took a long time for me to accept. Claiming depression and anxiety is the reason for the way you feel is ridiculous and cruel. You are who you are. You should be free to be able to accept yourself for who you are without other people, through lack of acceptance, demoralising you. I too, am with everyone else here. Give it time - as much time as you feel you need. As UniversalLover says at the end "Express your true self happily, and the right people will find their way to you. You just have to have faith" (*hug*)
I'm sorry it didn't go over well. I have to agree with the others. Give them time, they're understand with time.
Just give them time to fully absorb it. I'm pretty sure they respect who you are and what makes you happy. And also respect their perspective about it. Don't do anything that can make your situation worse. Just give them time to really think about it. Time will do it for ya. And also, I hope things get better for you. Good luck! There's nothing wrong about it.Continue being who you are
Just give them time to fully absorb it. I'm pretty sure they respect who you are and what makes you happy. And also respect their perspective about it. Don't do anything that can make your situation worse. Just give them time to really think about it. Time will do it for ya. And also, I hope things get better for you. Good luck! There's nothing wrong about it.Continue being who you are
