14 and too young to 'be together forever' (wall of text-sorry)

Okay, so you don't feel like you're ready to decide whether you want to spend your life with him. You're 14, it's okay. I've seen plenty of people at my school your age and my age who do the whole "You're my one and only forever and ever" thing; a lot of them end up breaking up within a few months. But then, two of my friends have been dating since ninth grade, and they're still together in college.

The point I'm trying to make is that you don't have to break up with him just because you don't think you want to be with him forever. I don't think the teenage years are meant for finding your life partner, although a small percentage of people do that. If you like him, keep dating him, but perhaps avoid making the declaration that you want to be together forever.

 

Well, my aunt and my uncle were an on-and-off couple since they were like 12... then they got married. And my cousin has loved the same girl since he was 5, seriously.

 

I have a friend who started dating her boyfriend when she was thirteen, they are still together now she's eighteen and he's twenty. In fact they are talking about moving in together. People do meet the person they love in their early teenage years, if you care about this guy then stay with him, there is no reason why you shouldn't.

 

Just stay with him. You love him, so be there with him. Just because you're not sure if you wanna do that forever dosen't mean you need to stop now. Take it as it comes, so to speak. If you decide you don't wanna be with him, end it, but don't end it for the sake of exploration ya'know?

 

Just enjoy your relationship in the here and now. Don't worry about the future or whether you are going to be together forever. If its meant to be, you will stay together. If not, then you will go on and fall in love again.

Now I have to say this as a mother............you are only 14 years old. If you continue to have sex make sure you use precautions everytime! An unplanned pregnancy at 14 years of age would be devastating to your future.

 

I totally agree with Becky; focus on the now

Your boyfriend loves you NOW, and you love him NOW, so just go with the flow, and time will tell whether or not things will turn out. I also agree with precaution-ness, don't take it for sure that you and your boyfriend will stay together, an unwanted pregnancy WOULD be devastating.

So yeah, in short, be happy that he's here for you at this present time, and allow yourself to be completely in love ^_^ You shouldn't worry about the future now, you've got your whole life ahead of you!

 

Hey babe (*hug*)

You're right --- you're only 14.

What's good about your age is that you really can't promise "forever" at this age. You're probably in High School, right? High School is a huge time of people in our age group. Most people "find themselves" in High School and realize more about who they are. The way I see it, you have a few years before you can commit yourself.

You two are going to have a lot of ups and downs during this time. When you face these little obstacles and get through them together, you'll be able to make a better decision about whether or not this is the man of your dreams or not. There's no pressure to decide now. If you try to make a firm commitment right now, then you'll be rushing it.

Your boyfriend needs to realize (and I hope he does) that love is a two way street, where the lanes are both of equal size. Don't rush into anything with him, and certainly follow your heart --- do what you think is right. It's your life, right?

Good luck (*hug*)

 

Think about this.

Who uses terms like "BFF"? Teens, mainly. (Or, in the case of Paris Hilton, somebody who's stuck there emotionally. ) Not people my age. Why not? Well, because we're older. We've experienced a lot. We've seen that relationships ebb and flow. My best friend when I was 16? I hardly talk to him now. It's not because we didn't work hard on making the relationship work. We just drifted apart. He evolved, I evolved, but we evolved in different directions. We don't have much in common anymore. But neither of us think it's a horrible thing. We still both have plenty of friends, and we enjoy chatting from time to time.

Don't worry about forever. Forever will take care of itself. Just take care of now. When your guy says "I want to be with you forever", he's saying "RIGHT NOW, I feel like I want to be with you forever". And that's a nice feeling. And maybe right now, you feel the same way.

Lex

 

Like everyone else is saying, focus on now. Today is all that matters, not the future that you have with this guy. But whatever you do, don't end it just because you aren't sure you want to stay with him. Stay with him because you care about him. And only, ONLY end it if the feelings you have for him, (or the feelings he has for you) fade and are no longer there. Love is the greatest thing you'll ever experience. I just ended it with my first love, and i'll never regret a moment i spent with him. We promised each other we'd love one another forever. Our saying was "Always and forever." And we meant it at the time. What we had was real and pure and beautiful. And you have a wonderful thing right now that you need to cherish and make the most out of. Just keep in mind, feelings can change, but not always. I am very glad that you are in such a caring, loving relationship. Make the most out of it though and focus on what the two of you have right now, this moment in time.

 

You love him, stay with him.
Until you have a good reason to break up, don't do it. You've got something beautiful.

He still makes you happy so forget the world.
Until your feelings change, if they change, then be happy with him.

I mean.. if you have the blessing of being able to actually be with him, don't ruin it.

 

I agree with the others. Don't focus on forever when you're in the here and now. If things start to change in the future, you can worry about it then. For now, just enjoy what you have.
My best friend and her partner have been together since they were 14. They'll hit their sixth anniversary this week. Don't listen to the people who say young love never lasts. It can, it does, and in your case, who knows? Maybe it will.

 

I'm going to agree with a few others, live in the now. You will be together for as long as it's right, whether thats another 2 months or another 20 years as long as you're in love it doesn't really matter.

I met my first boyfriend at a random birthday party for a friend, we starting talking and got on so well we decided to see each other again. We didn't know how long it would last or where (if anywhere) it was going. And now here we are in 2008 and next month is our 6 year anniversary.

Just goes to show you never know how these things will turn out.