When is a good age to come out?

There's no good or bad age to come out. Just come out when you're ready. For some people that's when they're younger, for others, they don't come out until adulthood or never (just look round this forum, people come out at all different ages).

Personally I came out as someone attracted to women when I was 12, by hinting to a few friends, then it spread across the school and beyond. It went well, and I think that coming out gave some people who used to be homophobic some real perspective that what they're saying actually hurts people.

But, basically, it's your choice when you tell others and it all depends upon the person and their situation. I'm one of the younger people to come out but people are all different.

 

There's no "right" age to come out. I cane out to my best friend when I was 12. And I came out to my parents when I was 14. I'm 15 now, and freaking out at the idea that maybe I'm not gay. Which is stupid. Anyway, if you feel ready, then go for it (as long as it's safe and you have supportive friends and family). Maybe tell a friend first? Which ever way is most comfortable. Good job om coming this far.

 

I was 55 when I came out to certain friends.

 

I'm 22 and I just came out to my best friend yesterday. I don't really know how I should feel right now. I'm kind of happy, but I almost feel like I wasted a lot of time staying hidden away. It may have been because of safety, but I still feel like I wasted my time.

 

There is no right age. It depends on the person, maturity level, life situation...

For most people I would probably say college.

 

There is no right age, only a time when you feel ready and comfortable doing it.

I personally came out at 16; and am 17 now.

 

Like everyone has said, whenever you feel ready.
I told my best friend at 16, and my parents a few months ago now I'm 2 weeks off 18.

I would say personally that being out is soooo much easier, and for me it really does feel better not having to hide anything from anyone. But don't rush in to it - maybe try and gauge your parents acceptance. My Dad sounds very similar to yours, amd I can remember on holiday last year he told my brother to stop being a f****** fag, but now he knows he's fine. You may also find it easier to tell your Mum or a sibling if you have any first.

 

I have to concur with others - come out when you're ready. I was too closeted and would not have been ready to have come out as a teenager, and it took me until I was 24 (nearly 25) to do so. However, I probably saved myself a lot of anxiety by being comfortable in myself and having more self confidence.

 

I'm 35, and just told a friend I was bisexual last night, this is the only person who knows. I was so closeted for years that I would never have come out younger. But it's 2015, times are changing, and I just think if you're ready do it, but make sure you are ready.

 

Hey there, you're asking a very good and important question. The answer to it is very simply, when you're ready and when it's safe.

I know it might be hard to tell when you feel ready to come out. I came out as demisexual to my friends first when I was around 16, and to my parents when I was 17. I felt ready to, I took the time to properly gauge how I thought they would react and I knew that I was going to be safe and that I wasn't about to be kicked out. The moment you tell is something you feel. You can build up to it, you can encourage yourself and give yourself the push you need to do it. But you need to feel ready and sure.

In the same sphere, I found myself in another closet when I came to terms with my gender identity. This was a lot shakier, but I'm twenty now. And feeling safe and confident in myself. That doesn't mean I'm ready. I came out to my best friend in February (after four months of stewing in change), my older brother in April and just a couple of days ago, I blurted it to my mom. I'm not ready to tell my dad. He has a harder time with this sort of thing.

Just try to gauge what your family thinks about sexuality. And if your family is the sort that will love you no matter who you are and who you love. There's no prime age for it.

 

I think it depends a lot on what your situation is. If you have homophobic parents it would be safer if you waited until you could sustain yourself, and if you feel your friends at school might not take it well then wait until you graduate. For example, I'm waiting at least until next month so when I graduate from high school. I don't think my classmates would react in a bad way, but I feel more comfortable coming out after high school.

 

I think this depends on your friend/family situation. If there's a risk of danger, you should wait until you're an adult and can support yourself alone. Otherwise coming out young is not an issue.

 

There is no such thing as a good age or bad age to come out... It's just whenever you are ready... I came out to a friend and mum at like... Hm... 19 I think... Then my sister at like 19 and half then another friend and my dad when I was 20. There is no rush to come out though, it is just when it becomes too much or you feel like you have to say something. Don't rush it, it will happen when it happens.

 

Age isn't as much of a factor as is potential risk. If it's severe (i.e. being kicked out by parents/partners/roommates) I'd recommend just waiting until you have a solid plan B. If you're stable though, just go for it.

 

I'm not an expert, but I don't think there's a "good age" to come out. I mean you should do it when you feel ready, regardless of your age.

I came out to a friend the day before yesterday and it feels nice, but strange. I haven't told my parents yet though. I think you should do it when you feel safe and ready, and it doesn't matter if you'll have to wait.

You should start telling someone you trust if you feel like it. And maybe wait until you feel more confident, take you time!

 

I'm going to join my voice with those who say it depends on your life situation.

Some kids are going through a purgatory called "having fundamentalist parents who would utterly destroy their child, from the soul-down, leaving a bleak, hollow, wretched carcass of a person rather than ever compromise in their misguided beliefs." Unfortunately, there is nothing that can be done to change the parents, and the only logical course, in some cases, is for them to wait until college. It is a terrible, scary thing to live through, and it drives a shocking number of LGBT suicides.

On the other hand, are your parents relatively liberal, regardless of their political affiliation? Do they come across as potential "PFLAG parents"? That is encouraging. Some kids, who have actively supportive parents who start to educate their kids before they have even come out, teaching tolerance and acceptance--especially self-acceptance--WITHOUT forcing their child out of the closet, that is ideal family to have.

Typically, your family will be somewhere in-between.

But you cannot just choose your family. Unfortunately, most people have to deal with the fact that their parents are PEOPLE, and people are imperfect and often misguided. Because of factors like this, you are the only one who is capable of knowing when or if the time is right, and even then, it is hard to figure out. At some point, you are going to have to make your best judgment and take a leap of faith, and you will be the most nervous you have been in your life.

For us LGBT, learning to understand this is just part of growing up and learning to be men and women, rather than children. Coming to terms with the fact that we sometimes have to be brave and patient, for Mom and Dad, is part of learning to be an adult, and it is often a very painful transition in your life. You cannot afford to count on Mom and Dad to know what to do, when you come out, because, my friend, they are probably more lost and more scared than you. It is your turn to be the grown-up, and it is freaking hard.