Heyyyy :smilewave Just wanted to get other people thoughts on this as I'm trying to decide if I should/how to come out to my mum next week. I'm 25 y/o and independant so I don't have to worry about rejection and that it would impact me too much, outside of emotionally. So I wanted to just tell her face to face... The thing is, before I "realised" I was bi (with mostly a leniancy towards girls rather than guys) I was in a relationship with a guy for 7 years, and my mum... Well, everyone just assumed that I was straight. Although she did accuse me of being a lesbian when I was in my teens because I always wore pants :rolle:... (I use that word "accuse" on purpose, because it wasn't in a nice way that she expressed assuming it). Soo... When coming out as bi, I want to word it something like this to her when sitting down: "Hey... I just wanted to talk to you about something. I know I was in a relationship with ____ for a long time, and it might be a while until I want to be in another relationship again. But I just wanted to tell you that I'm not sure if that relationship would be with a guy, it could be with a girl. It's not that I just like girls though, I like both. So it really could be either. I just wanted to tell you now, so in the future whatever happens I won't have to stress about it, and it won't be a shock." Does this... sound okay?? Keeping in mind hopefully at the time it would sound a little less cheesy :rolle: If it weren't for those reasons above, I would probably choose not to come out to her at all, but... I guess it might be best? My sister already knows, and is accepting. Whenever I tell her I have a crush on someone new she always asks guy or girl. My biggest fears with my mum is that she will just default me back to being lesbian again, not that I really have a problem with that but it kind of invalidates my past relationship (with a guy), and my feelings towards guys now/could potentially have in the future, or that she would act weird around me or reject me. Oh, she's also said she "doesn't get the whole 'liking both' thing" when I've tried to see what her thoughts about being bisexual might have been before :rolle: Eh, I don't know... Does all of this make sense?? Any thoughts about how this is worded or if it's a good idea?? :help: Thanks! (*hug*) ((OH!!! and congratulations any people from the US reading this!!!!! (&&&)))
I think it sounds good. Just tell her you've felt that way for a while, in case she think's it's a phase. And maybe make sure she's in a good mood and you've both talked about other stuff a bit to break the ice. It's scary but I think she should know, it sounds like while she probably won't like it or understand it, she'll still want you in her life and eventually get over it. It'll make it a lot easier if you get a girlfriend too
Ah, thanks! And yeah... Still working on finding a girlfriend :eusa_doh: Where are the non-straight girls hiding anyway :rolle: tbh, even if the next person I was with were a guy, after telling her that she would probably still think I was a closted lesbian anyway... oh well. Maybe there's not much that can be done whatever she thinks I guess :rolle:
I think that is a great plan. Its simple but meaningful. Unfortunately, her thoughts are her thoughts and there is not a lot you can do to change that. But you are being real with her, and thats what matters.
Hey honey! I don't think she'll reject you or she'll be mad at you but mostly confused? You said that she doesn't really understand s the whole "liking both" thing so I think she won't really get it at first. So did my mum when I came out but eventually I made her understand by explanations, support from my lovely brother and some articles I found online. Hope for the best but be prepared for the worst, honey but I really don't find any reason why it shouldn't go smoothly. Good luck sweetheart!
