Hey guys, I'm 18, fully in the closet, and getting sick of it. I depend on my parents, and just finished high school. Im living at home for college and unfortunately thats one of the main reasons I'm taking so long to come out.. since Gay marriage being legalized was one of the biggest stories this week, it gave me a good impression of how my family would feel by their reaction My grandpa was pissed, called all gay people pedophiles (so great, right?) My grandma said she didn't support marriage because of her religion, but its wrong that gay people that are together weren't able to visit when they went to the hospital or didn't have other benefits. Her religion is mainly a part of why she is opposed. I still think she would be heartbroken if she knew i was gay. My dad said he doesn't necessarily support it, but its a free country. I remember a conversation him and my grandpa had a long time ago when my grandpa said he was against gay people. My dad said "What the hell would you do if one of your grandkids were gay then??? Disown them? thats not right?" My grandpa agreed he would not disown us if me or my siblings were gay, but the conversation still didn't seem good to me.... My mom has literally never had one comment on gay people. All my life i have never heard her express her opinion on anything political. It's really weird, she is the ultimate wildcard. I want to say she would accept me, but you never really can be sure.. My aunt often talks about gay people. She has a gay hairdresser and said if her son was gay she would get her nails done with them lol. When gay marriage was legalized she didnt really have a comment. I believe she would accept me and she would be one of the first i would consider coming out to.. My brother is pro gay and i've already hinted to him that I'm gay many times, even to the point of him saying "i know sexuality isn't a choice, it's okay if you're gay" He would be the first person i come out to, and i would depend on him for a lot of help on coming out to the rest of my family. My uncle is a right wing conservative, says being gay isn't right, that gay people are only 2% of the population and shouldn't have right like marriage, and that it will teach kids that being gay is okay. I don't really care of his opinion at all, I'm only related to him through my aunt's marriage and my aunt only got married to him like 5 years ago, but him and my aunt have a kid and I'm sure if i came out he would put up a problem about me being around his 5 year old kid. Whatever i guess... One of my friends is neutral to gay people. When gay marriage was legalized he didn't care either way. Wildcard i guess...i think he knows I'm gay anyway My other friend goes to church 3 times a week.He thinks gay is an illness. He is pretty homophobic. When gay marriage got legalized he said "fucking faggots make me sick.theyre so disgusting" But in the same breathe he said he doesn't mind if they get married.......alright. with all this info, who are the first 3 people i should come out to, and how long do you guys think i should wait to come out? Advice coming out to my grandparents nd friends? i know they will be the hardest
the friends tell them first you should probably wait with the whole telling your grandparent's sound a little bit to risky to me
Just keep in mind that when you decide to tell them, have somewhere to go and at least one person to offer your moral support because your family won't respond well for you. You will have to give them space and time and then let them come to you.
Hi honey! I am sorry your family is so close-minded and that you don't get the support you deserve. You are a great person because you care about them and it shouldn't be this hard for anyone. Be proud of yourself and just go with it, jump out of that dark closet. If you think it's still too hard and really want a top: Supportive brother Aunt( she seems okay. My aunt is like this too) Supportive friend( i don't think you should remain friends with the one that thinks "faggots" are "disgusting" because i doubt he'll support you. your choice) Mom. A part of me thinks that you mom doesn't say a thing because maybe she either support gay rights, but since the other are so against it she doesn't want to start a fight? But you know how it is said "Hope for the best but prepare for the worst". Good luck sweetie and I hope it will make you happy and at least your father and grandmother will come around.
