So, I might as well start out by acknowledging the fact that I'm in a super privileged situation here, and I'm totaly aware of it. Which is why I, quite frankly, am embarrased about whining about it. But anyway, to the whining: I've previously not had much interest of coming out because I wasn't 100% sure, or I thought it was noones business anyway and bla bla. The usual altered versions of "I'm to scared to do it". But recently I've become obsessed with it. I sooo want to find a way of slipping it into a conversation in a way that's not making it a big deal, but still have the desired effect. Now, my friends will not care. at. all. Like, they don't give a flying f**k about whether you're gay or straight or a damn avocado. I think most of them figure I'm not straight anyway. I figure this because: 1. I was told about a conversation between a couple of friends discussing the potential of me being bi (back in high school, like 10 years ago - Something I denied because I had no clue myself ) 2. Because in discussions I've said "well I might like girls, you dont' know that." 3. When talking about whether I liked my bffs wife or not (which I totes do. She was being paranoid ), he said "well, when you meet a dude. Or a girl. I will at least [...]" So, pretty good set up. Clear sight, blue sky, ready for take off.. THEN WHY THE HELL CAN'T I BLOODY DO IT?!?! I have this thing thought out about saying how bearded guys aren't my thing - and its not the beard that's the main problem *wink, nudge* (cheese, I know, let's move on ) But I just loose my nerve every time. I can't do the whole sitting-down-i-have-something-to-tell-you-thing. It would be like "Guys, I just want you all to know something..*pause for swallowing, trying to not cry because of all the emotions*.. I have feet." Well, gee, THANKS for that super usefull information! (pardon all the sarcasm) It would just be super wierd. So obviously I don't need telling that I should just do it - cause it's already pretty obvious . I just.. I dont' know, I need to just say all of this to someone cause it's driving me mental and I need to vent. Maybe I need a pep talk. So like, if you've been in the same situation: what are your experiences with this kind of thing - perfect setup but zero nerves? What did you end up doing? How did it work out? Tips and tricks? Gimme all the dirty details!
I've been in a similar situation when I came out as genderfluid to my best friend. I knew he would not mind and everything would be okay but it took a lot to actually bring myself to tell him. I did not tell him face-to-face though. We were texting. Perhaps you could try that. If you're nervous you could casually send another unrelated message right after. Just tell yourself everything will be alright. Once you tell your friends you will feel a lot better and at peace. Good luck!
Good luck! So far I've only told one friend. She makes jokes about me wanting her. Kind of my fault really, I flirt jokingly with friends, I assume they always know I'm joking. I'm planning on telling a close friend soon and I know she would support me so I'll probably just be like "So, what would you think if you found out I liked girls?" Wait for supportive response "Oh good, because I figured out I like girls." Sounds like you'll be fine though. If you're usually casual and jokey around them, just treat this casually too.
I've never had this experience as privileged or accepting wasn't initially to tone of my community. But it's probably gut wrenching sentimentality that stops people from coming out in perfect circumstances or an environment. Perhaps it's just awkward lol
I know how you feel. Try to take it slow, come out to one at a time, or ask them, "What would be your reaction if I told you I liked girls?"
