I'm not really sure where to put this. It could either go in here or gender identity, I believe. I apologize if i put it in the wrong section. Every year, my school does a musical. I really want to do it. I always have, Ive just been to insecure to try out for a female role, and i definately wasnt trying out for a male role. Tryouts are about seven months away (I know im super early. I just like making exact plans that will be precisely the way I want them) and I really want to try out for a female role. The only problems are all relating to coming out. First, I'd have to tell my parents. I know that they'll be accepting. I'm just an awful conversation starter. I'm not sure how to start it. I dont want to tell them i have to talk to them about something, because then they'll just get realy worried and itll be even harder to tell them then. Id appreciate any advice for helping me tell them. The next problem is going to be school. Ive already told my class that I'm trans, but not everyone is accepting about it. I attend a small school, so i know that itll spread around that I tried out for a female role. I'd have to come out to alll of the kids at school who don't yet know, and most of the ones who do aready know will make fun of and bully me. I'm needing some advice on how to come out to the other students, and how to deal with all of the repercussions from just trying out for the role, let alone if by some miracle i actually get it. Finally, ive built up quite a lot of prestige among my teachers. Im a favorite of basically all of them. Ive had new teachers tell me that theyve heard a lot of good things from other teachers about me. Im worried of how much this will decrease my reputation. I guess i just need some help with learning to let go of things that are beyond my control, and to figure out how to tell my teachers the reason for going out for a female role. Wow. That became quite lengthy. I apologize. Thank you for taking the time to read all of this. If you have any questions, just put them down in the thread and i will answer them as best as i can.
You could talk to your parents about this the same way you're talking about it here. Just bring up how you would really like to try out for a role in the upcoming musical, and when they inevitably ask "which role?" then you can specify that it's a female role. Use this as a platform to transition into the conversation, perhaps mentioning how this would make you feel more comfortable, etc. Another way to come out is via letter, which is probably the most often recommended way (especially if you're not a big talker). It's really great that you feel you'll get support from them, as that can be a huge relief. Just take it easy and think it through well. It's good that you are already preparing so early on. As for your teachers, I don't think the fact of you being trans should matter to them as long as you continue being the good student that you have been. Teachers go through extensive training in how to deal with a wide variety of situations in schools and should respond in a responsible, tolerant, and kind way. If they do discriminate against you for your gender identity then you can report them. I cannot predict how the others students will react. Most likely, not everyone will be immediately on board with your new identity. And you'll need to be patient and perseverant. Surround yourself with a support group of trusted friends and allies - have them use your proper name and pronouns. Eventually others will catch on. Inevitably there will still be the jerks who give you a hard time about it. Ignore them. You don't need their opinion. If you need anyone to talk to, feel free to write on my wall. Best of luck. -Peter-
I dont want to use a letter for my parents because i used a letter to tell them i was pan. They told me to not be afraid to ever talk to them about something. Otherwise i would. The only reason i worry about school is because i live in a rural and very religious small community. My high schoo has just over a hundred peope. Thanks for the reply. I hadnt thought of using the musical as a means of actualy coming out to my paren ts. I might use that. Thank you. My friends are all accepting and try to remember to use my chosen name or its nickname and my preffered pronouns. Occasionally i have to give them a litte bump from time to time. But thats to be expected.
