Dear Mom, I write this letter to you now not because I want to, but because I know I have to. There is this part of me that you don't know about simply because of societal pressures and you, my family, I have been running away from my identity for almost 3 years. But finally, almost a year ago, I met someone who (made me question more in the first place) helped me to come to terms with who I am - I am a lesbian. By this time you are probably asking yourself a million question . Why is my daughter gay? What did we do to make her gay? What will everyone else think? - those are just a few questions that I think you will be wondering. I am hoping that I will be able to tell you much of what I want to say, but in case things get left out, I am writing you this letter to give me another chance to say what's on my mind. In any case, I'd like to tell you before we get into all of that, that I am the happiest that I've ever been. I've been dating someone for almost a year now. I know that you know her already, but I'd like for you to meet her and see us for who we really are. I am no longer lying to myself, my family or my friends. Alright, so that first thing I want you to know is that I have always felt I have been a lesbian, this is not a temporary phase, and it is not something I ever "chose" or "decided" to be, I've thought about it a lot, and as best as I can remember, I first felt that I was a lesbian around age 12, 13 or 14. Around age 13 or the beginning of middle school was when I felt this way and was sure of it. I would like for you to know that this is a very difficult letter for me to write to you because I know both yours and Tim's views on this subject. I can't help but to remember all the times you and Tim would talk about this at the dinner table but what you don't know about those days is that I was in a rush to finish my food and as I ran back to my room, I couldn't help but cry. So I want you to support me, I am your daughter. I want you to accept that I like other girls. I want you to love me but I really need you to accept that I want to live my life my way, which is this way. I strongly have these feelings and I hope that both you and Tim will accept me for who I am. I don't know if you would, but I hope you will. I hope that you will accept me and my girlfriend as a couple. Your opinion means so much to me but whatever you say or think, it will not change how I feel. This is something that I feel very strongly about. There are not very many people who know except my friends and Pam. I never told you or even planned to tell you until I was out of high school and was able to get my own place because I was scared of rejection, or even worse, you would kick me out of the house (which I still kind of fear) and overreact. But now I am confident that even if you do kick me out, I have friends who'll be more then happy to let me stay with them and that you will hopefully one day, accept me for who I really am. I have been a closed door to you for so long, now, I am opening up and hoping that you will accept what's on the inside. Your loving daughter, Angel P.S: If you have any questions, message me on Facebook and I will answer every single question you throw at me. I don't wanna hide in the closet anymore. This is my letter I wrote to my mom. I would like some opinion on it before I sneak out and lay it down where she would see it in the morning.
Wow. That is very insightful. I definitely think that your mom should read that. Even if it goes bad, it's still important that she learns of all your feelings this concisely. Good luck (*hug*)
It's a wonderfully written letter and I hope that your mother will see the beauty in you and the love you feel for your girlfriend! (*hug*)
That's a very well written letter! I think that you've covered the important points very well. That it's not "her fault", you were always like this, and that you love your girlfriend. I read your previous post...and I was in a similar situation but very lucky that she actually didn't find out. I hope you and your girlfriend get to stay together, and that she takes it well. Good luck.
I feel as if the use of the word lesbian repeatedly might invoke a fear response simply because people tend to reject those words when they are homophobic. They regard them as invalid. And saying she is overreacting puts her opinion against yours. You want to feel loved and included and so does she. You have to show her that youre still you and that being in love doesn't change who you are. That you still need a mom and that you crave her acceptance as her child. But I think it's a really good letter and if you already gave it to her I hope it has gone really well. I'll be keeping up with what's going on! Empathy might help if she has questions. But other than that you seem to be well on the way. I wish you so much luck.
