I want to come out and tell my parents that I'm trans, but I don't know how to do it. First I wanted to write a letter explaining things, but I SUCK at writing, I always make my letters or essays so short and not very detailed . Then I thought of doing a "congratulations, it's a boy" card, but I don't know if I want to do it that way or not now. Now I'm just thinking I might just come right out and tell them face-to-face. But I don't know if I should come right out and say "I'm trans" or kind of ease in to it, also if I ease into it, how should I start? "What are your opinions on trans people or the LGBT community?" "I've been questioning my gender lately, and feel more comfortable presenting myself as male." I'm so nervous!! :bang:
Hi Jaceius, You already presented a lot of possibilities. About coming out face-to-face, if you tell them right away that you are trans, you need to be more prepared to answer a lot of questions, because it may surprise them. If you prefer to answer the questions they ask instead of worrying too much about how to say it, and if you prefer to do it faster, then do this. If you prefer to go slowly, then i liked the two questions you wrote in your posts. About writing, if you want, you may post a preview of a letter here. I'm sure the community will help! Hugs (*hug*)
Keep in mind that you don't have to come out to them together and in the same way, I came out to my mum in person and my dad via email. It depends how open they are as well. If they are quite closed-minded then you could do your best to reassure them and tell them you're still their child, but this time their son. After all, they wouldn't have rejected you if you were biologically a boy, when they found out your biological gender. Parenthood should be about support and adjusting to their childs needs. But you can make it a bit of a story as well. If my sister hadn't outed me I might've made a cake announcing what I was(for me, a lesbian). Or you could make an awareness poster, a card(I like your idea) or give them a t-shirt. They might have suspected themselves. Are your parents sentimental? You could give them a son-to mother/father gift that might be quite sweet(if a little embarrassing). Good luck.
Thank you both for your responses. They're both pretty open-minded, I remember a few years ago, there was a thing on TV about trans kids, and my mom really sided with the kids, I guess I'm also pretty lucky they're not religious either. I like you're idea of a gift too, I may look into doing something like that.
Aww that gift idea sounds really nice and your parents sound like the kind of people that would appreciate that. I haven't come out yet about my sexuality, but for me atleast, I get the impression that coming out is something that the more you try to think about it and prepare for it the harder it becomes, especially about what to say. When it comes to that (as cheesey as it sounds) I think speaking from the heart, ie of the top of your head is the best way. Infact about an hour ago I was sitting downstairs in my hallway in the dark and I suddenly got a super surge of confidence and I decided I was going to come out to my mum, who was literally in the neighbouring room. I get up. I kick the door of my living room in (no hard feelings door) and I sweep into the room all grandiose like... She was asleep. Suffice to say I didn't end up coming out tonight. But anyway my point is you might have something (or a few things) that just make you feel that much more comfident about yourself, that kind of feeling that makes you feel like a badass! Mine is sitting in a dark room (don't ask) but yours could be anything, an activity, certain objects, even just changing your body language can give you a confidence boost. Good luck ;3
I'm kind of thinking of giving something like this to my parents: Maybe putting my picture in the bottom left corner, and a short letter on the back (postcard style). What do you think?
