So at least a month ago I came out to myself as gay, but now I want to come out to more people. I wake up sometimes wanting to come out to everyone and sometimes want hide it so much. I've only come out to five people and they're just my friends. No one in my family knows yet. Also my mom got divorced and married another man with kids who are pretty homophobic, so I feel as if I tell anyone it could get to my stepfamily and I'd be bullied by them. I don't know what to do and I need help.
Hi, OneStranger, and (a belated) welcome to EC. Take a deep breath. You came out to yourself a month ago and you're out to five people? Congratulations. That, actually, is a huge achievement. Give yourself some credit, okay? Telling the first few people is far from the easiest thing you've ever done. Telling family can be even harder, depending on how you think they will take it. First, think about whom you want to tell, and why. Your parents, because you think you owe it to them? A cousin you trust, an aunt you're close to? Think about how they might react, and if they will tell anyone else. Is your family really the next step, or do you want to be more out in general first? (Among colleagues/classmates...) How old are you? You mention being worried about being bullied. If you're still dependent on your parents, be sure they won't react too badly (like kicking you out) before telling them. You want to be safe above all.
Lyana is right coming out to anyone is not easy. As you can see i haven't, and I've know for at least a year. You should give yourself props for that accomplishment. And if your feeling this on and off type thing whether you should come out to more people or not, you probably should start out small with closer friends or trustworthy relatives. Then if you're still up to telling people and you think your parents will react positively or anyway not negatively you might want to, but if you are scared of how they might react you can always hold off. Hope this helped -Gamer/Andrew
