So, I'm going to have sex with a man. :smilewave That's really strange to say, considering I've had sex with countless women and now I am having sex with a man. Forgive me, but I needed to type that "out loud." So it will be my first time. Yikes! So of course I'm not ready emotionally, can't even wrap my head around it, so I'm not going to try: I will simply let it happen and let it be. However, there is one way in which I know I can and should prepare. That is physically. I will be the bottom, so you can imagine what I'm taking about. Even doing whatever to myself, I know there's no way some man's cock is going to fit inside me just yet. How can I prepare for it? It should be happening in a few weeks when school starts up again, by the way. I have lubricants, and a queen sized bed, and 22 years of gay sexual frustration. so most everything should be fine:icon_bigg. Yet I need to prepare! Help! Any other advice on actually doing it, tips any of you know, anything really! I could use some serious support on this because I am terrified. I cannot even think about it because if I do, I'll talk myself out of it, and I don't want that! I want him! EEK! :eusa_doh:
First off - and this is absolutely crucial - TELL HIM. Let him know you've never had sex with a guy. If he's experienced at all, he should know what that means - you're gonna need a lot of prep. Actually, you don't need to prepare before the event really. I wrote a really long "So You're Going to Have Anal Sex for the First Time" post some months ago - perhaps some kind soul can dig it up and link/repost it here. Until someone does, I'll hit the highlights. Yes, lube - and lots of it. Condoms as well. Yes, ideally he'll have them. But if he doesn't, you don't want to stop and go get them...and you DEFINITELY don't want to continue on without them. If you can, hit the bathroom first. Once you're all set, he should start opening you up. With lubed fingers. First one, then two. This process should take a while. Like a LONG while. Don't rush it. And don't let HIM rush it, either. If he's getting bored, pause for a minute, make out, stroke him for awhile, get him back into the mood, then continue on. While he's doing it, relax. It's natural to want to tense up, but try to "play dead" in that area. Once you feel relaxed with a couple fingers, you can switch to his CONDOM-ENCASED, lubed penis. Again, really slow. Relax. Take your time. It can take quite a while. But so what? It's not like you want to skip over the sex part, right? Once he's all the way in, give it another minute or so to get used to it, and then start. Have him try a few different "angles of attack" until you find the one you like best. Oh, and a plastic bag (to put the spent condom in) and a warm washcloth (for quickie clean up) by the bedside is never a bad idea. Lex
