OK, I have a friend in college who happens to live in the same town from me, know all the same people in the town and I am best friends with her roommate. Her roommate and a few others know I'm bi. But, this friend got wind that something is up by a gay guy who left a comment on my facebook which seemed flirty (I don't like him in that way I might add) and she started saying things to her roommate about me. My friend wants me to tell her. However, the problem is I'm not out to many in my town and under no circumstances can my family know. She has been known to blab on certain issues, should I tell her or trust her? It can be bad if she finds out without me telling her. I'm scheduled to do coffee with her tomorrow. Thoughts?
It seems like she's pretty close to finding out about it already, so I think your best bet is to tell her the truth and implore her not to tell anyone else. Tell her that you felt she should know but that you're not ready for anybody else to know. Hopefully she'll take it well and will respect your wishes.
Eh, sounds like she's pretty sure of it. If you do end up telling her, you should be sure to say not to blab... but it sounds like she might ignore that anyway.
Here's a thought - act like she already knows. So say something like, "I've been fretting about my family. I don't want them to know I'm bi, but I'm afraid someone's going to say something, and I'm REALLY not looking forward to that family meltdown..." Lex
hopefully she'll know to keep her mouth shut on such an important matter. I can't see her blabing something like that around, so when you meet her just tell her how important it is that she keep this quiet.
So I met for coffee and told her. The conversations were a bit dry and in the end it was awkward to stay there, though I'm unsure if she will blab around town. She seemed to take it well, but was actually somewhat shocked I told her.
I think most coming out's are awkard. Good job on telling her though, I hope you stressed the no blabbling! Congratz.
