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they already know?

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by amberger, Dec 29, 2008.

  1. amberger

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    When i lived with my parents, i met the love of my life. She came over often, and wrote me things and stuck them to my wall such as 'i love you' and my parents kinda knew i had a thing for her. I moved in with my grandparents and i snuck and went and saw her because my grandma knew of her and thought i used to cut myself because of her, which is false. But she didn't like her. She read my journal and found out i went to see her, and all the ways i feel about her. I explained that she didn't make me cut. my grandma asked me if i was a lesbian. I told her no, that shes just my closest friend and i love my friends. we went to the mall, and my grandma was there so i was paranoid she would see us, holding hands. shes supposto be sleeping over soon, and its just so hard to hide it because i am madly in love with her. but i'm afraid my grandma won't let me see her if she knows. I also hurt her when i act differently around people i know and i don't want to. What should i do?!
     
  2. Mickey

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    If you think your Grandmother might make you stop seeing her,continue as you are.
    Just explain this to her. And be very careful around your grandmother. I'm sure
    she's not stupid and she will pick up on this.
    I know it's hard,living under someone else's rules, but sometimes you got to do what you got to do. And keep your journal where she can't find it.
    I don't usually advocate lying,but in this case, it's all you CAN do.
     
  3. myra

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    I think your grandma might be more open to this than you think. I mean, she probably was a teenager during the hippie years and more than likely has had her own expiraments with girls. She did ask you flat out if you are a lesbian after all. And that's after she read your journal. I don't think its worth keeping from her. She'll just feel upset later on that you lied to her after she asked you. I'm not going to advise you to come out to her without prompting. But if she asks you again, just tell her the truth. Then make sure you explain that you really do love her. More than likely, your grandma knows and is more accepting than you realize.
     
  4. Lexington

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    First off, stop leaving clues from Grandma to find. :slight_smile:

    Secondly, maybe you should bring everybody on the same page. Invite your friend over for dinner, or maybe go out somewhere cheap. Let your Grandmother get to know her. Chances are she'll loosen up.

    Lex
     
  5. summersforecast

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    So you have to keep your relationship(assuming you two are going out) a secret. It will make it all the spicier, but like Lex said you want your grandma to be comfortable with this girl so bring her over and If you wan't advice from the best lier in the whole world I would make a false diary throwing her off with stuff about boys or something <-- that is if you don't want her to know. Of coarse there's always plan B of comming out to her if you feel ready enough.
    Hope it goes well.