Today is only the 4th day of school and rumors are already swirling like mad. One of the big "rumors" is about me being a lesbian. Well... I have had a handful of people come up to me (luckily friends) and ask if I was gay. The first time I nearly burst into tears, terrified. I said "No, I am pansexual" and I explained it to them. So far most people I've corrected have been supportive. I'm just utterly terrified that my mother will find out and be pissed off. Honestly I don't care if people know about my sexuality... but I just need to be super careful. I'm also emotionally weak and I tend to self-harm or mutilate if nervous, sad, or under pressure (I have severe anxiety and depression). I have a feeling my mental health is going to go to shit. Do any of you have advice on conquering this rumor? Advice on how to do with homophobes/bullies? Also...methods to keep my mind off suicide/self-harm would be nice too.
About the cutting and depression, I've been down that road. Do whatever you can to get away from it. Listen to music, whatever, just PLEASE don't hurt yourself. And who gives 2 fucks about who you like.... You're probably awesome.
I know its bad this is the fourth year I've been self harming.... I'm just rather anxious about my mom because she works at my school and she (only towards me.....) is a fucking homophobe...not to mention mentally/emotionally abusive
In my high school experience, I was outed before I'd even told anyone at all. I was so worried about my family finding out that I lied to everyone. If someone came up to me and asked I'd lied, it got so stressful lying to all my friends and the people around me. If I could go back an undo all the lying, I would. Point is, you should probably talk to a counselor and tell them what's up? The school guidance counselors are pretty helpful and you can tell them you don't want your mom to find out. Also if your school has a GSA, they can be pretty helpful.
Is there any other counselor you could go to? Maybe mention to your mom that you think having some counselling would be good? There is no shame in asking for help, especially when you're still in school. Things get stressful.
When in doubt; ask for help. There will be someone out there who is willing to help you. Rumours suck - I still have to put up with them even though I am out of the closet. I have Year 9 students coming up to me and asking me if I'm a lesbian (I'm Year 13 - USA equivalent would be senior year). When you're LGBT+ the rumours never stop I'm afraid. But there are ways to get through it. Find a hobby, listen to music, binge watch anime (I have no idea what you're into). I find that getting out of my bedroom and going and sitting in the same room as my mother calms me down a bit even if I'm not actually interacting with her. Keep at it and you'll get through this We all have your back.
I dont have anyone i can really go to because the people I do go to when stuff like this happen are in college and are busy. My mother works with guidance counsolers so I'd rather try to avoid them... I do watch anime and it's difficult at school to hide **update: Bullying as started to begin...I'm still not out
I don't have any personal experience with self harm but PLEASE don't do it :/ try taking your mind off stuff by listening to music, bingewatching stuff, etc etc As for the rumors, be aware of who you're talking to. If someone who is known to be a blabblermouth/homophobe/annoying lil shit/close to your family comes up to you and asks if you're lesbian, it's best to play it off. "Me? A lesbian? Where'd you hear that?" It might hurt to deny it initially but it will be worth it in the long run until you're ready to confront these people. If you need someone to talk to, feel free to post something on my wall, I'm pan and around your age as well and I feel like I'd be able to help :3 Good luck!
hi there. Were nearly there were you are right now. But I wasnt sure enough about myself and therefore told everyone about this crush I had on a guy. Its still public knowledge and I am not embarrassed but that was the stupiest thing one could have done! I destroyed my own hopes for coming out. So fu**** what the others say: dont lie. or in the end you will lie to yourself. your mother is homophobic, is your father (if you have one, sry. if thats a sensitive matter) too? Is there a good friend whoes parents would allow you to live with them, if you have outed yourself and could you out yourself towards them? If not, do you know someone in a lgbt community or do you have a girl/boyfriend? someone who always has a place for you on there couch? is there an option to change school using an excuse? I have a friend who harms herself. She says its like a drug and that one cant stop. think about how worse everything would get if you would start it again. There is no end to it. actually she goes running or does boxing if she feels the need to. search out a private place, your mother doesn't know about, your friends dont know about ( your closet can be enough) and have a good cry once in a while. after not one second more than an hour say yourself that its time to stop feeling bad for yourself get out there be strong, because whatever they say you can be strong and you are going to show it and then fight. ganbatte! that sounded a bit weird I know and if you feel better another way that doesn't hurt yourself do it and never give up. if you want to talk write me(*hug*) and good luck(*hug*)(*hug*)(*hug*)
