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Should I come out to my brother as trans?

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by Kodo, Aug 19, 2015.

  1. Kodo

    Full Member

    Joined:
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    Location:
    California
    Gender:
    Male (trans*)
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    So far I've only come out twice. The first time was in a GSA at my school, which I have since graduated from and have no contact with any of those people anymore.

    The second was my oldest brother (22 yr old). He was supportive, tentatively. We only really talked about it once, since I'm not one to do "touchy feely" conversations and there isn't a lot of time for us to have private conversations. Another thing is that he's not really always the nicest person... kinda volatile. Sometimes he's super nice and talkative, other times he's a jerk.

    That said, I've been contemplating whether or not to tell my next older brother (19 yr old). The main reason I haven't is because I honestly don't know enough about how he may react. He's very introverted, like myself, but we've always gotten along in the past. He has a very compassionate personality, but is also goal/action oriented and decisive about things. So for example, if he was decisively against LGBT matters then that could be bad. The main reason I've been considering telling him lately is because he has been "counseling" my mother with a problem, and his advice has been really thoughtful and thorough. So I figured, if only he could help me out...

    But alas, he is a huge question mark. If I came out to him it would be through a letter probably, and not verbally (I almost through up last time I came out verbally).

    I'd consider "probing" him about his stance on trans people, maybe from a media story or something. But (a) that would be suspicious and (b) might not yield a great answer since his answer is most likely based in family opinion or ignorance concerning trans people in general.

    *sigh*

    Any advice?
     
  2. Foz

    Foz Guest

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    Location:
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    You seem to have a good relationship with him, unless coming out puts you in danger, I say do it. Whether you choose to do it in person or by letter is a matter of personal preference.