i'm deciding whether or not i will want to ever come out to my family in the future. for one thing, no one in my family is gay/bi/lesbian so that's really bothering. i'm also not sure how my mom will take it but i'm sure that if i tell her i'm bi, then eventually she would tell my dad. my biggest concern is my dad. he once almost found out i was bisexual when i was in eight grade (i was unsure at the time) and he was so pissed but i convinced him and told him i wasn't and he's forgotten all about that incident. also whenever we go out and some "gay-looking" guy just happens to pass by, he will point him out to my brother and i. they both laugh so of course i go along with it. i just don't know if he will be able to take it seriously and be supportive or if he will hate me or just joke around with my brother and laugh at me the way he laughs at other guys.
Hey! First of all, only you can decide when the time is right to come out. Telling family can be hard, I should know because I haven't told any either. (just my cuz) But sometimes people act that way because they personally don't know anyone who is gay/bi, maybe if you come out to your family it'll open there eyes passed the stereotype. But just incase, maybe i'd wait until i'm able to support myself before coming out to the fam. I wouldn't wanna be disowned or anything, and don't want that happening to anyone else either. Good luck. (*hug*)
i don't think that's why he laughs at gay people. he sometimes even imitates them and when he does, he does it in a feminine way (don't know if i'm being clear) but i agree that if i do decide to come out, it should be AFTER high school.
Hi Bryan I don't know if this exactly works as advice, but my dad is incredibly homophobic, and I'm just making sure I spend all my time at university on the other side of the country, with a view to settling, and will tell him when I'm sure I never have to see him ever again. Maybe that sounds a bit brutal.
You're out to three people already, who are they? Here's what you need to do. Several things could happen from your coming out. Some good, some bad. List them and see if the advantages outweigh the disadvantages. List them in this thread if you want.
i actually want to go to college out of state but my mom doesn't want me to >.> they're 3 of my online friends so i don't know if that counts.
Hey Byran. First of all, i know that your family and friends making "gay jokes" hurts, but you said none of them are gay so im going to assume they dont know any gay people? Alot of people will make gay jokes cause they dont know anyone whos gay, but when they finally realize someone they know is gay they most likely will slow or stop the jokes. IF they can put a face to the person they are making fun of they will realize its not a good thing to do, and that being gay does not make you different. (atleast thats how it went with my friends when i told then) As for coming out to your Family, you are obviously not ready too right now, but thats fine! You should wait till you feel good and ready, or atleast until a major need to comes up. Its important to accept yourself first, and once you do accept yourself telling your family will not be as bad. Sometimes though, telling people your gay can help you accept yourself. If you feel the need to come out to someone, i would suggest a close, female friend. Or a close male friend, really just whoever you think will back you the most and be supportive. The more people you tell the easier it will become.
that's what im working on right now:deciding which of my friends at school would be most understanding and supportive. the problem is that my cousins go to that school so if i do come out, there's a slight chance that they will find out and that's the last thing i want to happen. unless i ask that person not to tell anyone else then that would be fine.
Ahh, i understand. Dont want it leaking to your family before your ready, that would be awful. Whoever you tell then, make sure they are a solid fortress to protect your secret. (also remember everyone is only human, so things *do* slip)
Do you think it would be easier telling your mom or do you not want to tell either one? If you think your mom will be okay with it,maybe talk to her? IDK...you have to do what you think is right. Coming out sucks for some people. Whatever you decide,you always have people here to talk to. We care.
