ok, so i'm only new to this site and this whole forum thing, but from what i've read so far, this site seems friendly, and so im wondering if anyone at all could offer me some advice. im 15 years old, and live in australia. i am gay and have known for years now. at first i denied it but now i feel like there is no use in denying it. this time last year i came out to my best friend, and they took it very well. they seemed comfortable with it and were just really great about it. since then ive come out to only 5 other friends and am way to scared to even consider coming out to my family. although my father has passed away, it still seems that even my mum couldnt handle having a gay son. anyway, the real problem is this. i think i am in love. i have known this guy since i was 10 years old, but really became close with him at 13. i have had a thing for him for years, and cannot decide whether he is straight or not. its like i am obsessed with him!! he is all i can think about, and its really starting to eat away at me. ive always just ignored it. these days i am no longer close with the friend i came out to a year ago, and she has developed a crush on this same guy. the night she told me was one of the worst nights ever. i denied still liking him... but i dunno. it just really hurt. and now she thinks im ok with it. i would really appreciate some advice, or even some people my age just to talk with. i have no gay friends and i find it really hard talking to straight people about my "issues" thanks heaps everyone,
Welcome to EC! I wanna congratulate you for accepting yourself for who you are and sharing that with others, especially at your age! Only you can know when the time is right to break it to your mom, make sure the advantages outweigh the disadvantages! As for your crush, It's a sticky position. I'm sure we've all crushed over our straight friends atleast once, and I can say that it's probably best for you to distance yourself a bit. If he's truly straight it would just end up hurting you. Feel free to message me anytime you want!
thanks yeah it feels good. yeah, what can you do! i'll get over it soon enough i guess. not much use complaining over it at this point. thanks heaps man
I think that keeping your distance is the best way to go. If this girl friend of your's is crushing on him, too, then chances are he's a no go. And I've been here a few times, and every time it's ended badly. You've just got to sort of "quit cold turkey" and try and keep yourself away so as to keep the thoughts away. Other than that, there's not much you can do. Maybe having a talk with your friend would help, so you don't feel like you're hiding anymore. As for your mom, only you can know when it's time. Usually that's when you're about ready to burst from keeping it inside.
Does your crush know you're gay? It's rather silly to hope that he'll let you know that HE's gay if you won't share that same information with him... Lex
I agree with Lex. Also, crushes happen, and it will die down eventually I'm sure. Coming out will come in time, when you know it's right.
