Ok, I'm 13 and I'm sick of being in the closet. I want to come out to my friends at school and my hockey team. I live in an area that's very open minded and carefree, I've never seen or heard of bullying at my school so I'm sure that I would be fine. As far as I know, there aren't any LBGT students at my school but there is a gay teacher who I barely know. Any advice on how to come out, such as too whom and when. Also, my team only met last night so we barely know each other.
Well, start with people you fully trust and work your way out. Do it soon if you feel confident that people will be accepting. You got this!
Hockeyplayer, If you feel the need to Come Out that is your decision. Although my situation is quite different, I run an adult hockey league, those that know I'm gay treat me no differently now than before I Came Out. Locker room is the same game is the same. Your in school, as long as you prove yourself to be able to play your position I'm sure you'll be fine. You may want to try and have a conversation with your coach and let him know, not that your looking for any special treatment. Rather in case anything ever did he wouldn't be caught of guard. Just so you know there are Gay adult hockey leagues all over the world. This year have 2 teams comprised of Gay players. Hockey is the best game as far as I'm concerned, no matter how old, what skill level, or our sexuality there is a team for you to play with. Now go and enjoy the game.
My head coach is older (55?) and I'm not sure how he'd react, but the assistant coach is recently out of college and I know him well, I might tell him.
Perfect, I'm sure he'll be good with it. Bet your Head Coach will be just as supportive. My generation has made great strides in tolerance. BTW, what position do you play?
@50ishandout, could you point me in the direction of any gay leagues in PA? I am a 21 year old (not out) hockey player looking for a new league to join after quitting my college team. I know for a fact we don't have any gay leagues here in Northeast PA but I'd be willing to travel somewhere within a reasonable distance. I feel like maybe being a part of a team that shares the same struggles playing the game I love could help me with the coming out process. And to the OP, I applaud your courage. I wish I could have had that much courage at 13, Maybe then I wouldn't have missed out on so many opportunities. Well, forget my personal problems, here's to left wingers!
Hey! I have come out to most everyone I know. I have learned that coming out to family and coming out to friends are two completely different things. If I were in your shoes, I would first try and develop a relationship with your gay teacher and then, come out to them. This way, when you come out to others you have a strong authority figure to back you up and support you if things don't go great. Find people you trust, build a relationship with them, then come out to them. I wouldn't come flying out of the closet to your hockey team immediately. Just feel out the crowd and see if it would be a safe environment for you to do so. I only say this because of your age. If you were older and probably more capable of standing up for yourself, then I'd say screw it! Come flying out of the closet! Show up to hockey practice with a rainbow jersey! However, I only say feel out the crowd first, because I just want you to be safe. Hope this helps! -Devon
