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Plea for coming out advice

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by Wavefunction00, Sep 3, 2015.

  1. Wavefunction00

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Sep 2, 2015
    Messages:
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    Location:
    London
    Gender:
    Male
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    So, about me:

    Like it says, I'm gay. (Interestingly, I think that's the first time I've ever said (or written, if you want to quibble) that, ever. So that, in and of itself, is a big milestone. (kilometerstone? Any better for the modern world?)). I'm pretty, no, extremely, confident about that. The thing is, not a single person knows yet. So this is going to be a plea for advice, essentially.
    The thing is, I've just moved to London (from Far Asia, a country where being gay was very illegal, which was fairly important), with my family, so the nearest person I know well is 14,000 kilometres away, and the time difference means it's ridiculously ineffectual to try and talk to them. Either this is a godsend, a clean, unbiased slate to start off with and tell people, or a catastrophe, since if things go horribly wrong, then I'll be ostracised forever. I'm not very good socially to begin with (A fairly huge science nerd would be the term, I think), so things could easily go wrong in the event that I did come out.
    I'm not close with my family, we're all kind of distant to each other. And it is a posh private school I've just started (this marks the second week), so I don't know really what the mindset it going to be, whether it is the liberal kind of people or the conservative.

    Query: What on Earth am I meant to do?
     
  2. Riyuzaki

    Riyuzaki Guest

    I say don't rush things. You just moved and you can't possibly know what could happen. Also,you're only 14 so why not wait a year or two and see who might support you and who won't.
    Keep it to yourself for a while. Check the atmosphere in that school so that you know what people think of gays. You don't have to out yourself right away. Once you make some good friends who are supportive you might consider doing it. But that's just my advice.
    Anyways, welcome :smilewave
     
  3. UniqueJourney

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Aug 31, 2015
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    Location:
    Midwest USA
    My immediate suggestion is to give yourself some time to acclimate to your new school and the very different country that you're in now. There's no rush. As time goes on you'll have a better feel for whether it's a more...or less safe environment to consider coming out in. And you'll also have a better idea of who, in particular, you you might want to come out to (and be safe doing so).

    For now, the fact that you're comfortable with yourself is a wonderful thing! It took me more than 20 years to be ok with my sexuality.

    I'm happy for you that you are now free to consider coming out and discuss it online!!