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I've realized I'm bi and really want to tell one of my best friends

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by confusedmind, Jan 5, 2009.

  1. confusedmind

    confusedmind Guest

    I'm a 20 year old guy, living in a relatively small city where everyone knows everybody else. I've been called "gay" by tons of people since I was in middle school, and I've always denied it--because it's not true. But over the last year or so I've realized that I am bi, but I lean more towards girls. I just am not totally straight, like I wish I could be.

    I've become really good friends with a guy over the last several months, and I trust him more than I trust any of my other friends. I can't stop thinking that I need to tell him this secret. I know that he's totally honest with me about everything, and for some reason I just want him to know about me. I just NEED someone else in this world to know. I think that someone like him knowing could really help me get my head back on straight.

    I've thought about writing him a letter, since I doubt I could ever admit it face to face. I don't want to come out to everyone, not even to my other friends. But I really trust this guy and think that it might be a weight off my shoulders if somebody else knew.

    Do you think it's a bad idea?
     
  2. JustAnotherName

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    Welcome to EC!

    It isn't a bad idea, you trust this guy and it seems that he trusts you just as much and will value you being completly honest with him. Coming out is scary thing to do and can be difficult at times but it does become easier over time. From my own experience it will most definatly feel like a weight off your shoulders =]

    It might be an idea to mention in the letter, that for now you don't want anyone else to know and ask that he talks to you after he reads it.

    Good luck, and remember to let us know how it goes (*hug*)
     
  3. Ralphtruco

    Regular Member

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    Well no i dont think is a bad idea... of course it can always go wrong, wat i would do if i were you (wich i did) i makin sure first that hes gonna be completely ok with it (we had a friend that was gay and then i told him),and he helped me so much times (listened to my problems a things like that) and everthin turned good... well kinda xD
    so if u feel like hes a real friend he shuld understan u should tell him.
    but oh xD i first telled a girl to umm be more confortable with it (its easier with a girl xD)
    at least that is wat i did

    welcome to EC xD
     
  4. summersforecast

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    Hey man welcome to EC. First things first, being straight is totally over rated :icon_wink second off I think if you feel like you can trust this guy then you should tell him, but it would not be a bad idea to find out what his views are on bisexuality/homosexuality before you tell him. A letter is perfect if you don't want to have to deal with that imediate reaction, it gives them time to cool off and adjust to the information. So It would really be the best thing to think this over you know, this cannot be rushed. Talk with us here at EC find out how most people take it when you come out as bisexual and mainly just think about what's bets for you right now.
     
  5. BitterEdge

    BitterEdge Guest

    It sounds like a good idea.
     
  6. EM68

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    Welcome to EC! I think a letter is a great idea. I am planning to come out to my parents next weekend by letter. I have it posted in a thread. Good Luck!
     
  7. gaius

    gaius Guest

    Welcome to ec I have just done this kind of thing 2weeks ago over msn and it helped me loads,she helped me tell her boyfriend who is also my best friend these two together have made my life worth living I suggest you tell him asking as you trust him and know how he feels about people who are bi,whatever happens, good luck!
     
  8. foxkid777

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    It sounds good, but its totaly up to what you decide to do =] if you trust him, he probably would feel the same and will ok with it
     
  9. Psychedelic Bookmarks

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    Hey, welcome. It sounds like a good idea. If he's that good a friend, he will respect your wish not to tell others yet. Be brave, and do it! (*hug*)