I've been pretty out for a while, so my perspective may not be so great, but I am hoping someone here can give me some insight on how to best proceed with my recent ex gf that has just come out to her Mom and was disowned during an already difficult time for her. I want to get some insight from anyone has experience with anyone who has withdrawn from their partners after coming out (specifically if their family has rejected or disowned them) or had their partners shut them out after coming out, or even if you know of friends who've gone through similar things. What advice do you have, how much patience and push/pull did you put up with, and what was the result? Small Backstory: Me and my ex (3 1/2 year live-in relationship) were rocky leading up until this, but we were really working through things after separating this summer. It wasn't until just before and after she came out (2 weeks ago) that she has shut me out for the most part (she is hesitant to see me now, and texts/messages from her have become suddenly rare and responses to me come sometimes after hours or days). To be fair about her side and hopefully dispute the argument that she's just not that into me anymore (she's trying to accept and work through being homeless, having no other family, not having a job after graduating school, and having trouble passing a state licensing exam to find a job). She has a lot on her plate, and she says she can't be in a relationship, or think about one now, but she still loves me, and holds my hand when I see her. She's just really open some moments, and then disappears for hours and sometimes days without words, so it's very confusing for me. Thanks for reading, and look forward to reading any responses you may have.
I was writing this at work, so I didn't get to put down a couple important things. I know that relationship wise, I should give her space, but I am heartbroken for her, and don't know if she is shutting me out as a way of dealing with her pain. She's dealt with a lot of abandonment in her life, and I feel like she thinks I may walk out on her, so she might as well get rid of me now since everything else seems to be spinning out of control, rather than let me in, and fear losing me later. I'm not planning on going anywhere, I worry though about how far I can push in terms of being there for her, because I'm worried sick about her being in such a poor situation. As a friend I want to be there, but as someone who loves her I want to be there even more. , and I'm worried that me trying to be there for her is putting pressure on her because she knows I do want to eventually get back together, and she's just not ready now or possibly ever. Sorry if this is wordy. I just am so lost on the appropriate way to handle this so I don't lose her forever.
