...Where have I been? I poofed out of here, amirite? And then again, you might have not noticed. This holiday season was so stressful. And the only way that I can truly show how stressed I was am is to write everything down in a expanded/condensed rant/list. So take a deep breath and see if you can relate. 1. I was going to tell my family. I really was. I had the speech planned in my mind. And then I started talking to my dad. And while I thought he had learned to shrug off the nonsense in Leviticus, apparently that's not the case. We got into a pretty heated argument over whether or not gay marriage should be allowed. He figures you can have "civil unions" but if you call it marriage then it is going against God (I won't go into how we talked about atheism). I simply told him he was arguing semantics. And seperate but equal isn't equal. Blah de blah blah. Essentially, I chickened out. I'm just too scared to tell them right now. I figure since I live across the country, they won't find out until I tell them. Whenever that will be. 2. I also didn't tell some of my closest friends. Because I'm a wimp. Sigh. 3. My final grades are not back yet. And I have a scholarship riding on one mark that I haven't received. I was supposed to have all the marks in by this past Tuesday. They are still not here. But I guess I'm in the same boat as the rest of the McGill students. Everywhere you go on campus, you see people checking their transcripts and then flipping off the computer screen. 4. The exterminator was supposed to come over the holidays to kill the mouse in my apartment. But nooooooo! I guess he couldn't for some stupid reason (like he was on holidays). And so I set traps myself. And yesternight, the mouse walked over to the trap and looked at me right in the eye and said, "Fuck you." And then skittered off. I will kill that mouse. I will stomp him into the ground. The exterminator is coming tomorrow. So I have to move anything he could steal away. Because you can't trust people who work with vermin. Maybe. 5. My former roommate and best friend has now officially moved back to Alberta. So I'm more or less alone in Quebec. And I had to find a new roommate over the holidays. Which I did. But meeting a new roommate is stressful. I don't know if she's a psychopath. Or that she will wig out if I bring a girl home for the night. Or she will pawn off my television to buy crack cocaine. I don't know these things. 6. I have to get a job this summer. Which isn't really an issue. But even if I worked a 40 hour work week, the best pay I can get here is 10 dollars an hour. I can pay my bills and whatnot on that wage, but I can't pay my tuition. I could got back to Alberta to work and may a shitload of money... But then I'm paying rent on apartment I'm not living in. And I know my parents say they will pay for any costs that I can't, but I don't want to seem like a freeloader. Especially because I'm getting a cat. 7. I'm getting a cat. And this is the first animal I have ever owned on my own. I think I'm ready, but I get nervous about if it gets a urinary tract infection and pisses everywhere or he doesn't like the litter box I buy him or his kidneys fail or I step on his tail and he hates me forever and ever. And I cried on the phone with the animal adoption woman when I was trying to explain what happened to my older cats (both who ran away, making me look irresponsible). And I have a small apartment. I will have to make sure the litter box is spick and span. 8. I have so many readings to do and it's only the first week. 9. I want to go back to kung-fu, but I'm scared my sifu will be pissed off with me for not attending during my exam time. I am really out of shape. And when I go back, it's just going to show that I haven't been practicing and that I'm a useless slob. 10. I'm fat. Still. I just can't stop eating. I try to control it, but even when I buy healthy food, I just KEEP EATING. For supper, I had two cups of pasta. And a huge package of peas. And two bowls of cereal. And two glasses of ice tea. I'm not even hungry and I can just feel myself wanting to eat. 11. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHRGGGGGGGGGGHHHHH. 12. I'm lonely. SUMMARY: I'm a basket case.
Aww *BIG HUG AND SQUEESE* I almost killed an old lady driving home from school, by almost i mean a penny width away from her flying into the air like the bike from ET. Dunno if that helps, but atleast life sucks for more than just you 1. I told my parents, they are being horrible about it Dont rush into it like i did, make sure you would be ok with a not-so-great response before you tell them so you can be ok after IF it goes south! 6. Freeload. If your parents brought up the subject, then Freeload your ass off cause thats not shameful! 7. Make sure its a nice kitty, and go for it! Pets fix all your emotional problems.
3. I have a shitty GPA. It's the one from my old school where I did horrible because of everything that was going on. Not really the same thing, but it's the closest I have. 6. Get a job. Freeload. *nods* 7. I want a chinchilla. *blinks* *blinks* ...
Awww (*hug*) I would agree with the above advice. Freeload. You can decide that you'll pay them back (but keep that decision to yourself!) I'm sure your cat will be fine. They're very independant. And I've never known one that's too fussy about what kind of litter box it has. It might end up ridding your place of the mouse. Lonelyness could very well be driving you to eat. Not sure what to suggest - other than there are worse things you could be doing, so don't beat yourself up too much. Try to stay positive, active, and on top of things. Good luck!
