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I Got My Transcript.../Getting Things Off My Mind

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by Amy, Jan 7, 2009.

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  1. Amy

    Amy
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    ...from Livermore (my old school).

    I feel so worthless. With my GPA, I can't even take classes at the community college because my GPA won't change until I finish a class at my new school (I don't know how long it will take).

    I had a shitty GPA last year because of my depression and it got even worse this year with that depression plus the hell of being who I am.

    Get ready, because this is going to be me saying what I haven't said about how I was treated.

    I was treated like shit and didn't go to alot of my classes because of it. When I did, I couldn't even focus.
    My favourite subject--with the best teacher--became hell. The guy behind me (who I can totally tell is gay, by the way) treated me like shit as well as nearly a third of that class. I was called disgusting like it was the most obvious thing in the world more times than I can count.
    I was harrased in Algebra everyday. All I did was have a button on my bag and a flyer on my binder for No on 8, and I was bullied, yelled at, had one girl chant "YES ON 8, YES ON 8", literally, in my face. The day after the passing of Prop. 8 was announced, I was told that California didn't "want" my "kind" here. And the worst part? It was a Mormon girl who told them to shut the fuck up and stop being stupid assholes (her words, not mine). Of all the people who would defend me, it was the Mormon who supported Prop. 8.
    The one class that I thought I was going to be safe in was Drama. I mean, come on, it's DRAMA; I didn't think I'd get shit for being so...not straight. But I was. And, once again, it wasn't the Mormons; they just kept their views to themselves. And t hurt like hell to be called a disgusting dyke in the theatre.
    When it comes to English and PE...let's just say I rarely went.


    If you are still reading this, I totally love you. :kiss: (*hug*)

    I actually feel a bit better. I haven't told anyone much about this.
     
    #1 Amy, Jan 7, 2009
  2. musican

    musican
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    That sucks (*hugs*)

    I can understand how that feels beacuse last year I got depressed and I didnt go to school much, and when I did I slept through it or I might as well have because I didn't pay attention at all because I just couldn't concentrate. My grades got really low, and I thought that I would fail all of my classes. I probably would've, if I didn't get a tutor. Now the same thing is happening again, and I'm not sure what to do. I hope things work out for you. (*hugs*)
     
    #2 musican, Jan 8, 2009
  3. Amy

    Amy
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    I hope they do too. For both of us.

    I'm in independent study right now, so I don't have any assholes there to ruin my life.
     
    #3 Amy, Jan 8, 2009
  4. musican

    musican
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    That's good that you have independent study, it must make it easier. I wish I just had a tutor and didn't have to go to school, but when I talked about it to my therapist, she said that I would be running away from my problems and that I would never figure out how to deal with things that way. Whatever.

    So what's independent study like?
     
    #4 musican, Jan 8, 2009
  5. Amy

    Amy
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    There are different programmes, but mine is technically "alternative education" (which means hella people think it's for dropouts).

    I go in once a week for an hour and I get my work. Then I turn it in the next week.

    And you wouldn't be running away. You are avoiding a harmful environment. :wink:
     
    #5 Amy, Jan 8, 2009
  6. musican

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    That sounds reasonable, I would just have to make sure that I actually did the work because lately I've been feeling to distracted to do work.

    That's my view too. We'll see if I can explain it better when I go back tomorrow, or later today rather.
     
    #6 musican, Jan 8, 2009
  7. Shevanel

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    Hey feel better, my gpa is 0.367 at the moment lol
     
    #7 Shevanel, Jan 8, 2009
  8. Amy

    Amy
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    Wow. I don't know if I should congradulate or hug you.


    Yea, no. You're staying on and we are continuing our conversationg, mkay?
     
    #8 Amy, Jan 8, 2009
  9. musican

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    I meant that I'm seeing my therapist later today and that I would try to explain it to her again.
     
    #9 musican, Jan 8, 2009
  10. Amy

    Amy
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    Phew. :slight_smile:

    Tell her that you have a friend who is doing a similar thing and she is doing better. *nods*
     
    #10 Amy, Jan 8, 2009
  11. musican

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    I'll see if she agrees then, but i doubt it. I really don't like talking to therapists because they always seem to think they know better than you do about what is best for you.
     
    #11 musican, Jan 8, 2009
  12. Amy

    Amy
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    I knoooow...
    It's terrible.
     
    #12 Amy, Jan 8, 2009
  13. foxkid777

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    Omg that sounds depressing =[ its ok you still have us as friends =]
     
    #13 foxkid777, Jan 8, 2009
  14. musican

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    Yea, but it's more frustrating. I don't know what to do when adults think they know more than me because they're older. I want to throw a tantrum and yell about how mature I am, but that would defeat the purpose of saying how mature I am, lol.
     
    #14 musican, Jan 8, 2009
  15. Amy

    Amy
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    Me too.
    I hate it when they think they know more about me than I do.
     
    #15 Amy, Jan 8, 2009
  16. musican

    musican
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    The worst part is when I know that I know more than they do, but they won't accept that I might know something that they don't; there's no way to convince them that I know what I do becuase they don't want to hear it.
     
    #16 musican, Jan 8, 2009
  17. Amy

    Amy
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    Exactly.
     
    #17 Amy, Jan 8, 2009
  18. musican

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    Adults need to grow up hahaha
     
    #18 musican, Jan 8, 2009
  19. Tim

    Tim
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    Is there a specific requirement for your community college? I had a 2.6 GPA for my HS years (Gogo depression, I'm with ya on that, woulda had a 3.8-4.0, but I got Ds and Fs for 2 years :stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes:), and my friend had a 1.2, and we both were able to enroll for classes, I dropped out before they started, but she's still in it...

    (I'm not quite sure HOW she graduated with a 1.2... but *shrug*)

    Community colleges normally accept students with low GPAs, but you have to call in, ask for an appointment with the student enrollment leader about possibly coming in with a low GPA. If you can convince them you'll be a good student, they'll typically let you try for a semester on academic probation.

    At least that's what it's like here, I'm unaware of in Livermore...
     
    #19 Tim, Jan 8, 2009
  20. Amy

    Amy
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    For Las Positas, I have to have a 2.0, which I don't. It really sucks, but I'll call in for an appointment.
     
    #20 Amy, Jan 8, 2009
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