I am bisexual and I tried to come out to my dad yesterday but I must have gotten cold feet and when he asked me am i straight or do i have feelings for guys(I am a guy) I said no and he said promise that i am ok and I said 'I promise'. So now I promised that I don't need to talk to him about anything and now I fear that if I tell him he will be all over the fact that I promised and I bet he would keep asking 'Why didn't you tell me earlier?' So I need help. Is there any more subtle way of coming out than saying I am bi? Best Regards, TheBiBoy
Despite you making a promise to your dad, in my personal opinion it was more of a forced promise. If you did end up coming out to him and he were to ask, 'Why didn't you tell me earlier?' well the simple answer to that is, you were afraid. Coming out isn't something everyone can do with ease. You're going to be telling someone a big part of your personal life here and that's a really big deal. Try not to focus on the fact you promised your dad that you don't need to talk to him about anything otherwise it'll only make you feel much worse. In my personal opinion, some promises are best being broken. If you do want to come out to him without actually telling him, you could do things like conveniently leave your computer screen on where you conveniently have a picture of a guy open on it, some news article about bisexual males, have a conversation with him about bisexuality or so on. If you're really worried about how to come out to your dad, if you've come out to anyone else you could always ask them to try and drop hints to your dad for you which could prompt him to come chat with you. If it leads back to the 'Why didn't you tell me earlier?' speech, again, coming out is a big deal and you were a little afraid.
Thanks for that answer! It is really good advice and I will try that the next time I see my dad!But he keeps saying its a phase and in my heart I know its not He wont listen to me about it.
Relax, You'll find the right words at the right time. Have a look at various coming out stories both on this site (http://emptyclosets.com/forum/comin...unny-responses-you-got-when-you-came-out.html is good) also YouTube has some good coming out stories. From what you say I think your dad will be cool about it. As regards 'Why didn't you tell me earlier?', just tell him you weren't ready to talk about then. Don't give out to yourself for getting 'cold feet' coming out is a scary thing. Being brave is not about doing something dangerous, it's about doing something you are frightened of. (*hug*)
