Has anyone first identified as bisexual and came out as bisexual but later then came out as gay/ lesbian? How did people react and stuff? I'm thinking about coming out as lesbian and I'm already out as bi (I'm a homoromantic bisexual but I feel that it would be easier to say lesbian). But I'm nervous about the reaction of people, even my closest best friends. I've told no one about this even the people I'm really really close to because of their reaction (my best friend is bi but she would never imagine me as lesbian so I'm just nervous about what she would think and say). It is because I used to find guys really attractive and stuff and I was very open and loud about it but I've completely changed and rarely find guys attractive now but I've still left that impression of the boy crazy teen girl. I don't know what to do?
Yeah I did the same thing about a year and a half ago, having been out as bi to a few people for a little bit of time. And before that I talked about girls a lot and had a gf for awhile. If someone asked me about it, here's what I said: once I finally came out as bi and gave myself permission to think about guys instead of trying to fight it, I realized that I pretty much only thought about guys, and relabeled myself accordingly. I also make it very clear that if Jennifer Lawrence were interested, I'd turn straight in a second
If she came out herself as into girls then she's all mine! :la: Everyone thought I was bi for around 2 years, purely because I sort-of... am... like, into guys a little? They all attributed my girliness to that hehe. I say it's okay to kinda say "Actually I like girls more" before going on to say "I only like girls" because of the way people's minds work: sudden changes in information seem to upset humans more, and they think you're confused because THEY'RE confused. Wow people are confusing!
I think, for the most part, people will be understanding about it. There are a lot of people who find the opposite sex attractive and talk about that a lot, even have lots of relationships with the opposite sex, but then down they road decide they are gay. Either because of denial, or the fact that their sexuality simply changed, it happens. I think people usually respect that if you come out, there's a lot about your journey with your sexuality and your feelings that they don't know and those who are accepting wouldn't judge for something like that. And if someone brings it up, you can explain to them exactly how you feel, and it's their choice how they want to take that but it doesn't change the fact that that is how you feel and how you are. I have a friend who always thought she was straight, even had lots of boyfriends and kissed them and stuff. Then she thought she was bi and eventually wound up being gay. It's just the way it is, no one really thinks about how she had boyfriends. It's not like it invalidates how she feels now, because it's how she is. I think this is one of those things where you think it could be really hard, and yeah coming out often has it's challenges, but I think once you're out you'll realize it wasn't that bad and people will probably be more accepting about it than you think. I'm sure it will all go well, I mean you've already come so far, not only accepting yourself, but telling all your friends that you're bi. That all takes a lot of courage and self-awareness and is very challenging for some. The fact you've been able to do all that at this age really says a lot about you and I'm sure it will all turn out alright. Best wishes<3
