I feel in love with a girl about 2 years ago and she was one of my bestfriends. I knew she was straight but i just had to tell her.... it didnt go so well and i havent talked to her or seen her in about 7 months. And once again im starting to fall extremly hard for a girl, who is straight, and again is one of my bestfriends and im scared. I dont know what to do... I dont want to lose her friendship but i cant stand talking to her because it makes me sad knowing i will never be with her. And i know if i stopped talking to her it would make her sad. Because she doesnt like to hurt me, she knows im bi and that iv like her before and iv liked her for about a little more then half a year. Im just scared to get hurt like i did the first time and i honestly have no idea what to do.
Aww nicole I know exactly how you feel. I have a large crush on my best 'straight' friend. I try and get closer but he pushes me away. I keep trying because i live and breathe HIM. And i know deep down he feels the same way. I haven't come out to him yet, but you've come out to your friend and shes still your friend, thats good! But, you say you've been out to her for about half a year? I think if she had 'more then friends' feelings towards you, she would've said something by now. You never know though, she might surprise you. I think you should take it easy and remind yourself that you have a kickass friend who accepts you for who you are. Just go with the flow and you may never know what happens. Good luck! (*hug*)
How would she react if you told her? It can sometimes help if they know (assuming they aren't intimidated by it) and you could hopefully find a way to actually remain friends but without her doing anything that you could interpret as a sign she may like you back. One common thing people do with their crushes is they go looking for signs that they are gay/bi/whatever and analyse their every move. It's not a position you should put yourself in otherwise it will all come crashing down eventually. Perhaps limiting your time with her may also be a good idea. I don't approve of cutting her out of your life as she hasn't done anything to deserve that anymore than you have, but cutting down your time around her may still help and it won't affect your relationship. When you aren't around her the best thing to do is keep yourself active and not sit around letting her play on your mind. You will not get over her if you aren't trying to keep her out of your mind and concentrating on other things. It will be hard at first, but eventually it should get easier and hopefully the feelings will fade away.
I'm not sure limiting your time really does anything though...if you didn't see here everyday you would still think of her everyday right? I kinda just think that matters of the heart need to heal themselves...you can't force it untill you're ready to move on. Sorry - I know this isn't helpful.
That's why I said she needs to keep herself distracted. Distancing yourself but sitting there thinking about it is useless. Trying to keep your mind distracted elsewhere gives an opportunity for that to change. I can't offer a completely effective way of getting over somebody, but attempting to take your mind off that person with numerous activities isn't a far-fetched approach at all. It may not work for everybody, but it can work.
