Alright. I'm 16, my middle sister is 21, and my oldest sister is 25. I'll call the middle one (not real names) Bethany, and the oldest one Lindsey. Bethany and Lindsey have always been really close, and while I'm very close to both of them as well, since I'm the youngest by quite a bit, I've always had a little more out on the edge of the "sister circle" than what they are. Shoutout to all my fellow babies of the family, we rock!! Anyways, I've known I'm gay for about a year now. I'm out to all my friends and anyone who asks me (that doesn't know my family), but my dad is a pastor and is very against homosexuality. Bethany even said a few years ago that she was against it too, but she has gay friends. I don't know if her view has changed since then - her boyfriend's cousin is gay, and she got a little frustrated that her boyfriend's parents liked his gay cousin better than her. I don't know if that means she's against homosexuality, or just frustrated with his parents. Alright, so my other sister, Lindsey, says that she is for gay rights, but still thinks it's a sin. Keep this in mind. Both of my sisters have always made fun of me about one of my guy friends. They think he's cute and they want me to like him (of course, they would never force me to like someone, but you know how older sisters are ) One time, Bethany asked me, "Why don't you just like anyone?" and I said, "I don't know." And she just went, "Huh." Like she was questioning me... that's when it started to dawn on me that maybe possibly they suspect I'm gay. Then, one time, she asked me if I thought a guy was hot, and, like any normal human being, I know when someone's attractive, whether I'm gay or straight. But this guy was not hot. So I said, "No." And she just went "WHAT?" and then another "Huh." Then, in the car once when we were talking about this guy she always makes fun of me about, she asked me, "Do you even like guys? Because it'd be one thing if you were gay." I denied it, and she said another, "Huh." Now, Bethany and Lindsey converse about everything. So my theory is Bethany told Lindsey she thinks I'm gay (if she does), because last night, Lindsey talked to me about the same thing. She has a "forever boyfriend" (a guy she's going to stay with forever, but never marry because they aren't the marrying type), and so I was just like, "You and Bethany both have people, I'll find one when I go to college." And she was like, "You know, I'm going to get super awkward and uncomfortable, but you artsy people [I'm a filmmaker, P.S.], there's something about you guys. But if whoever you want to date, like if you want to date girls, if you want to experiment, your sister and I are fine with that." I never denied it, I just shook it off. Then, a little while later, she gave me a huge hug and said, "You just need to talk to me. You can tell me anything." So, do she and my other sister suspect I'm gay, or is this just coincidence? What do I do if they do suspect? I'm so confused, because I never thought Bethany would be fine with it, but Lindsey just said "your sister and I are fine with it." And I thought Lindsey thought it was a sin, even though she supports gay rights. Like, make up your mind, sisters!! Because of all this, I don't know if I should just come out to them or not, since I don't know exactly where they stand. I'M SO LOST. Sorry for writing a novel!
I would say it seems like they probably know, or at least have strong suspicions. But also, I think the fact that Lindsey said you can talk to her about stuff and they'd be okay with no matter who you dated is very promising. I don't think she'd say that if she didn't mean it. If she suspects you're gay, she could be worried about how you've kept it hidden and you're dad's homophobic. So she probably wants you to know you have an ally if you do want to talk about it. Sometimes when people think homosexuality is a sin, but support gay rights it's that they think homosexual intercourse is sinful but loving relationships are okay. Or maybe she's just on the fence. Either way, it sounds like regardless of that she seems willing to accept and help you if you are gay. It's your decision if you want to tell them though. Just because they may know doesn't mean you have to tell them if you're not ready. Based on what you said though, I think they (or at least Lindsey) would be accepting and helpful to you. And hopefully they'd be understanding if you didn't want them to tell your dad about it. Hope this helps and good luck!
I wish one of my sisters would ever say something like that. The best quote I got so far is ´I wouldn´t be over the moon, but what could I do?´ (and that coming from the most forward-thinking of them..) Anyway, your sisters probably know. There are just too many incidents. But that´s ok, it seems that they´re ok with it and it is safe to tell them.
From what you've said, yes they probably know; it's probably safe to come out to them too. They sound really supportive too which is really good, not everyone is so lucky in such a religious family (I'm assuming everyone because of your dad being a pastor). I would hold off on coming out to your dad though, pastor parents can be very unpredictable, plus you said he's homophobic so that's not a good idea to come out to him until you're out of the house, safety first.
I had a similar experience with my twin sister and I think your sisters know or suspect strongly, but also are honestly okay with it. Accept what they've told you - don't be afraid to talk with them about it! Kind and supportive people are few and far between in this world, don't hesitate to trust such people when you find them. Sounds like you and your sisters are cool people! ^.^
