I tried to come out to a straight friend and it didn't go well. We have been friends for several years and have mutual male gay friends so I thought she would be accepting of me. Instead she cut me off mid sentence and then accused me of coming on to her. To make matters worse she gossiped and tried to turn other female friends against me. I was extremely angry and hurt but fortunately things have calmed down. We were sitting across from each other at a table in a coffee shop so I'm not sure why she would think that. I might be newly out but I know appropriate conduct. Is it possible she is homophobic? I really want to get past this but I'm not sure I can trust her now.
hi I´m sorry to hear that your friend reacted like that :/ I don´t know why she would do that when it seems that you didn´t do anything...you only told her that you are lesbian right? Anyway, I think it would be good if you talk to her about her, somewhere in private tell her that you only wanted to share a secret about yourself with her and you didn´t mean anything bad with it. Tell her how it hurted you when she did those things..I hope she will realized how wrong her reaction was and you two will be all right again. Although, I doubt that you will trust her completely again :/ Oh, and tell her that being lesbian doesn´t mean that you want every girl in sight :O (she is straight, does it mean she wants every boy in sight? Hell no, she should probably think about it a little). I´m bisexual and I guarantee you that I don´t want to jump everyone in my sight that thought is just ridiculous And if she will react badly again or something I think you should consider if you still want to be friend with her (she is probably homophobic if she reacts badly again) Because this kind of behavior can be bad for you. I don´t know how many people know that you are lesbian but if you are not fully out maybe you should find another friend/family member and told her/him. Choose someone you trust, someone who supporst lgbt+ community. (If you don´t know if someone is okay with not-straight people, try asking questions like: would you mind having a gay friend? what do you think about these kind of people? Like that, you will find out if they are okay with it ) Also, you mentioned other female friends...maybe not all of them feel the same way as your friend maybe they are actually okay with you so try talking with them too (if you are comfortable with it) I wish you luck! I hope everythink will be all right have a amazing day
Thanks for the supportive comment! Actually, I never got the words: I'm a lesbian completely out. This particular friend I thought of as a sister which is why I thought it would be okay to come out to her. Maybe I just wasn't ready to come out to straight people yet. I still feel so fragile about all of this.
