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I dont know what I just did and I am panicking

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by MayaBee, Oct 30, 2015.

  1. MayaBee

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    Today I KINDA came out. I was feeling the urge to tell my best friend the whole day and in the last hour of school, we both had this "I love drama class but right now I really dont wanna go"-feeling, and we both wanted to skip class. So as we went to the toilet(I'd asked her to come with me, I wanted to be alone with her), I said to her:
    "hey, wanna skip class? It's not because of drama class, but I really want to tell you something. In private."
    For me, that was a HUGE step. Now I was at the point of no return. But her answer confused me.
    "umm well, I kinda really wanna go to drama class. I dont wanna miss anything."
    WHAT?!
    Just minutes before she had told me that she really didnt wanna go. Now I am panicking. I dont wanna tell her anymore, because now I feel really insecure. I feel like she doesnt wanna know about whats been bothering me for the past, and I still wanna come out, but I kinda lost the trust I had in her that she'd accept it. Did she know what was bothering me? does she want to ingore that? I am so confused. And the next time I am seeing her, is on Saturday at a party, where lots of people are coming. And I dont wanna see her since I dont know what to do now, just play it off, act like nothing happened?
    I just wanna go back in time and stop me from saying that I have to tell her something.
     
  2. NamingIsHard

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    Honestly, it sounds like she's clueless. While what you want to say may feel obvious to you, "I want to tell you something in private" is a phrase that could lead in so many other directions. If you feel ready to come out, I'd say you should still go for it.
     
  3. Ally Girl

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    I would say se didn't feel like going but didn't want to miss anything, as said by NamingIsHard that phrase could mean anything, I say if you could meet her before the party or if you want wait until afterwards, I highly doubt she meant to hurt you by going to class as it sounds like she doesn't know what you wanted to tell her, I know how you feel but keep the faith, just next time you two are alone remind her you had something to tell her then tell her (I know easier said than done) but still, and if you want to lighten the mood do what I did when I told my guy friends I'm trans female which was "so you know don't be getting a crush on me know hahaha" good luck it'll be ok :slight_smile:
     
  4. Secrets5

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    Hello,

    Maybe you could tell her privatly outside of school, or maybe at break/lunch when there is no lesson. That way you can see if it really was the lesson or what she thinks you're going to say.
     
  5. Mags the Goron

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    I'm pretty sure she had no idea that you wanted to come out. As stated before, "I really want to tell you something," is very vague, so she has no way of knowing what you wanted to tell her. Besides, when you come out to someone, you're telling them because you think they don't already know, right? Unless you have a reliable source telling you that she knows, then you can' tastiness that she does. That'd be illogical. And anyway, even if she previously stated that she doesn't want to go to class, did she say that she genuinely plans on skipping? It's not strange to not want to miss anything from I class you love, even if you're not in the mood. I'm not sure about Switzerland, but where I'm from, it's very common to not want to miss a class.
     
  6. lilla

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    I agree that she probably has no idea what you were going to say and just didn't want to get in trouble/miss anything important in class (even though she didn't want to go). I really don't think it was a comment on her not wanting to hear what you have to say, although it would have been nice if she'd been a bit more receptive to wanting to hear what you had to say. Good luck if you do decide to come out to her!