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So Confused with no-one to advise me..

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by novaastra, Nov 2, 2015.

  1. novaastra

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Nov 2, 2015
    Messages:
    10
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    Location:
    ireland
    Gender:
    Female
    Sexual Orientation:
    Straight but curious
    Out Status:
    Not out at all
    :bang: I'm so confused & need to gain some perspective but finding it very hard!! :help:
    I've dated boys when i was really young but avoided sleeping with them, always said it was because of this and that. My first kiss was a girl & when drunk I end up kissing them, I never thought of them sexually until now really. I've had boyfriends when I was a young teenager & enjoyed kissing them but anything past that I hated. I really liked a guy as an adult but I didn't enjoy anything sexual, it always felt like i had to 'pretend' to enjoy it but I never did. When I looked at him I thought 'wow I love him, hes beautiful' but having to do anything sexual was just so 'yuuuck.' The thought of having to sleep with a boy regularly is not something I ever want but I don't know if I'm asexual or maybe just gay?! I've never been sexual with a girl but think about it a-lot though when I see girls in the street I've never thought 'oh shes so hot, I want to have sex with her'
    (Sorry I'm trying to explain as best I can haha)

    Then I met a guy who technically was what I've always wanted but kissing him felt so lifeless even though I loved everything about him. I started to think what if I'm bi/lesbian and this is why I've always hated being intimate with boys. When I'm drunk I think nothing of kissing boys but i never do it sober and If a boy asks me to hang out, I make sure there's alcohol involved because otherwise I wouldn't do it.

    Its only now I'm starting to become mindful as to why I constantly avoid intimate situations with boys..

    I have no friends to even ask about this and ive tried to say to my sister but she just ignores me. Would appreciate someones thoughts on it :slight_smile:
     
  2. Xanesa21

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Oct 21, 2015
    Messages:
    57
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    Location:
    Paris
    Hmm... What do you think about go and try with a girl and see what will happend?
    Without alcohol of course :grin:
    Maybe you're bisexual but more attacted to females? Hard to say tbh.
    I'm also not sure about my orientation so i know what do you feel.

    Good luck girl :3
     
  3. YermanTom

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Nov 3, 2014
    Messages:
    731
    Likes Received:
    37
    Location:
    Co Wicklow Ireland
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    1. You now have friends on this site that you can ask.
    2. Drink can cause you to make not great decision.When I was going through the same thing, drink messed me up.
    3. After the referendum, most Irish people are totally cool with everyone's sexuality.
    (*hug*)