:bang: I'm so confused & need to gain some perspective but finding it very hard!! :help: I've dated boys when i was really young but avoided sleeping with them, always said it was because of this and that. My first kiss was a girl & when drunk I end up kissing them, I never thought of them sexually until now really. I've had boyfriends when I was a young teenager & enjoyed kissing them but anything past that I hated. I really liked a guy as an adult but I didn't enjoy anything sexual, it always felt like i had to 'pretend' to enjoy it but I never did. When I looked at him I thought 'wow I love him, hes beautiful' but having to do anything sexual was just so 'yuuuck.' The thought of having to sleep with a boy regularly is not something I ever want but I don't know if I'm asexual or maybe just gay?! I've never been sexual with a girl but think about it a-lot though when I see girls in the street I've never thought 'oh shes so hot, I want to have sex with her' (Sorry I'm trying to explain as best I can haha) Then I met a guy who technically was what I've always wanted but kissing him felt so lifeless even though I loved everything about him. I started to think what if I'm bi/lesbian and this is why I've always hated being intimate with boys. When I'm drunk I think nothing of kissing boys but i never do it sober and If a boy asks me to hang out, I make sure there's alcohol involved because otherwise I wouldn't do it. Its only now I'm starting to become mindful as to why I constantly avoid intimate situations with boys.. I have no friends to even ask about this and ive tried to say to my sister but she just ignores me. Would appreciate someones thoughts on it
Hmm... What do you think about go and try with a girl and see what will happend? Without alcohol of course Maybe you're bisexual but more attacted to females? Hard to say tbh. I'm also not sure about my orientation so i know what do you feel. Good luck girl :3
1. You now have friends on this site that you can ask. 2. Drink can cause you to make not great decision.When I was going through the same thing, drink messed me up. 3. After the referendum, most Irish people are totally cool with everyone's sexuality. (*hug*)