I have been married 22 years and have three wonderful girls, all looks picture perfect from the outside. I have been working my way through therapy for the past 10 years, dealt with a lot of issues, and I have finally stopped denying who I am and discovered(?) I am in fact a lesbian. I thought I could continue to live in the marriage silently suffering, but not upsetting status quo. But I cannot do it, I am slowly going down a very dark hole, and I think the only way to stop the descent is to come out to my husband. But how? How does one do this after being married for so many years? I am so stuck. I live in a small town and there is no LGBT outreach center to help figure this out. Anyone been in this boat?
I can somewhat identify with you. Can't figure out my true orientation though. Married, husband and kids, fell in love with a woman 7 mo ago. This is my secret so far - getting used to the idea of being in love with another female, but many questions still. So don't think I am ready to state anything to my husband. However, there are quite a few EC members in similar boat posting under LGBT Later in Life. Try posting there. Good luck figuring out your path. I am sure you will find help here