I have always been really close with my mom so when I came out to her I knew how she was going to react, she didn't really care and that was all good and well but not I'm going crazy. I have 4 brothers and I'm the only girl, the oldest boy in the family is basically my best friends we came out to each other. Me as a bisexual and him as an Asexual. The other boys are kind of like my dad...a lot like my dad. I told one of them that I had a girlfriend our conversation went a little like this: "Who you texting?" -"My girlfriend" "Girlfriend?" -"Yea...girlfriend." "You don't like girls." -"But I do..." "So you're lesbian, dude stop it. You trying to act cool and like a hipster because of the LGBT thing." -"But I really do like girls. I'm bisexual." "What ever, let me know when you end that phase." My brother isn't being mean, he just doesn't understand. I have always been an iffy person and I hardly tell any of them anything about me personally. I usual deflect situations regarding my personal life because I know they are really old fashioned. The brother above and my Dad are almost twins personality wise, and I've always been daddy's little girl to him. I know my dad probably won't believe me but I don't want to disappoint him either. If later on in life I fall in love with a girl and we decided to get married, I don't want them to think I've been lying or that I'm a lesbian because I really am Bisexual. It's not just a phase to me and I've been thinking over how I should tell my dad and when. I don't know if it's fair to keep the secret to myself and not tell my whole family, I really would like to be able to come home one day and tell them about an amazing date I had with a girl...or the other way around. My dad's side of the family tends to think right and wrong....They are right and if it contradicts them you are wrong. No one on his side of the family has come out as being gay or bisexual. So far I believe I'm probably the only Girl liking girl on that side of the family. My mom's side is super understanding because they don't really care about that. If you aren't married to a guy to them it doesn't really matter. You are you. But my dad's side is judgmental even when they don't want to be. Everything you say lingers over you for years, and years, and years. I want to tell my dad because I always feel like I lie to him when we are out or he jokes with me about my love life. What should I do when I know he won't believe me? Should I tell him or wait until I am dating a girl?
If you think it's safe to tell him and you feel ready to do so and like you want to, you should. Maybe they're really stubborn and you may not be able to change his views, but if you tell him, no matter how he responds, all you can do is keep on being yourself and one day he'll probably see that it's not a phase, even if he still doesn't understand it, but that will probably take time. It would be nice if you can start being honest and open around him, but that could also mean living with him not believing you and not understanding for a while. Unfortunately, you kind of have to decide what's more important and worth it for you going forward. Perhaps you could ask your mom to help you tell him? And you could probably ask him not to tell his other family members if you don't want them to know yet. Hope this helps and good luck!<3
Maybe write him a letter? Sometimes that sort of thing can be seen as more believable, or mature. Then again, letters aren't everybody's thing. In any case, make it believable. Whether that's presenting a girlfriend, or else presenting the matter in a serious and mature way... (Not that you aren't being mature) But let him know that you're serious. My best bet would still be the letter idea, but you know what would work best in your house hold.
