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Cant make sense

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by silverhalo, Jan 19, 2009.

  1. silverhalo

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    Ok so i dont know if anyone else feels like this, or has ever felt like this but its been spinning round in my head and i thought maybe if i wrote it down it might become clearer, but now im trying to write it down im not really sure what to put.

    I just feel really confused and everytime i think ive figured it out in my head and made a step forward, something changes. I dont know whether its like im trying to persuade myself out of it or what but then it feels like im back where i started.

    Im sorry it doesnt really seem to make any sense now ive read back what ive written.
     
  2. Mirko

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    Hi there! If you wanted to start writing down things, just start with single words that describe your feelings. For example, your first word could be 'confused.' Then ask yourself, what else do I feel? What might also help, try asking yourself questions about your feelings. For example (assuming you are talking about your sexuality):

    When I see a girl or a guy that I know and like, what do I feel?
    Do I have an attraction towards girls and/or guys, or just girls?

    Those are just a couple of questions but you can see where I am going with this. Try explore the feelings that you do have. Every time you feel something write it out. For each day/week have a separate piece of paper. It doesn't matter if it makes sense at this point. After a little while, go back to all the notes and go over them and try to organize them.

    That said, trying to figure things out can take a while. It is important that you allow yourself to explore all the feelings that you do have and follow what feels right for you. If something doesn't feel right take a step back and ask yourself why? Explore that part. By doing that, you will eventually get to a point where you will have figured it all out.

    Take your time though so that it will not become too overwhelming.

    I hope this helps a bit.
     
  3. silverhalo

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    I will give it a try thanks. Im not very good at discussing things at the best of times, and i think because it frustrates me :bang: I keep just shutting it away at the back of my mind, and hoping it will either go away or just resolve itself. But im actually coming to the conclusion that maybe im actually going to have to talk about it, if I am ever going to actually figure it out. But that is a scary thought, im so rubbish at talking about anything significant. :eek::icon_sad: