I'm a bi male in high school. I only found out my sexuality about a week or two ago, but I think I've been bi for quite a while without noticing. Anyways, I've only come out to about 5 people, all of them being my best friends who I know I could trust. All of my best friends are in a friends group and we're all very close. The only one of them who doesn't know about my sexuality is this really conservative/Republican guy who's always been VERY anti-lgbt and transphobic. But that's never been a problem. We've never let our contradicting beliefs get in the way of our friendship. But now, there's an obvious problem. If I come out to him, it's likely that he will never want to speak to me and one of two things will happen: he'll convince the rest of my friends to kind of kick me out of the group or he'll end up distancing away from us. Like I said, he's VERY homophobic. I wanna cling to the hope that maybe he'll let this not get in the way of our friendship, but he's already noticed I've changed a bit over the past week or so, and according to one of my friends he thinks I'm becoming a faggot. I don't want this to ruin our friendship but I know I want to be open. Any advice??? ---------- Post added 26th Nov 2015 at 12:28 AM ---------- Note: all the rest of my friends have been extremely supportive and are all pretty liberal
In my opinion, if he's not willing to accept you because of who you are, then he's not worth your time at all. That being said, I think it's best for you to come out to him when you feel comfortable or if he ends up asking you about it. I hope that it will work out for you. This is one of those circumstances where all you can really do is take a gamble. When I came out to one of my friends who's homophobic (in a reserved way, she's just uncomfortable), all she ended up saying was "I don't really get it but okay. Just don't hit on me". Maybe it will work out like that for you? It's hard to say. If it doesn't work out, then...well, he was probably a lost cause anyway. But hey, you have a lot of other friends who've got your back. Best of luck, kid (*coughs* even though we might be close to the same age, I don't know *cough*).
First of all, nice avatar, love undertale. Secondly, I'm gonna take your advice and wait till I'm comfortable. There's a chance he can get past it like that, and I'm willing to gamble if it means my sexual freedom. Also, I'm 15, so we're pretty close in age
As AgenderMoose said you should only come out when you feel comfortable.I really hope your best 'friend' comes around.I put friend in quotation marks because I he cannot accept you he is most likely not the friend you deserve.A friend should be there for you no matter what, be it your sexuality or something else. Although saying that my best friend I don't know if he is homophobic.He says stuff about gays but tinkerer sounds really homophobic but I don't want to lose him because he is the only best friend that I hve.And if I tell him the while class and even worse the whole school will know and I will get bullied a lot evaluate the whole school seem to be homophobic. When you are coming out to him, talk to him first about homosexuality and bisexuality and just try to gauge how homophobic he is.Then if he seems very homophobic turn don't come out to him if you are too uncomfortable.But if he seems not a great but homophobic you could come out to him and if he doesn't accept you, you could just say 'Look, I thought you were my best friend. A best friend is there for someone no matter what and you don't seem to be there for me like my other friends.Ifbyou don't like me for who I am then we shouldn't be friends and just leave me alone'.I don't know if that will work but if he still bullie you make sure you hve someone you trust to talk to about him.You could always talk to is on empty closets
