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Have a crush and I can't tell whether he's been flirting with me or not!!

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by conflictedmetro, Nov 26, 2015.

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  1. conflictedmetro

    conflictedmetro
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    I'm a high school senior and decidedly gay. (I'm new here, btw.) I'm still very much closeted, though if I somehow get a boyfriend, I do plan to come out to my best friend, as hard as that may be. Anyways, to the matter at hand.
    There's this one guy in my class who's extremely cute and I have a really big crush on him. I go to bed with him on my mind and I wake up the same. I beat myself up everyday wondering if he would, could, or ever will like me back.
    I know; these are the same symptoms of a person who is obsessive, but I can't help it. I feel like he's led me on in the past, his disposition is the same as someone who has a crush on you. According to my sources, if someone flirts with you, it means they are attracted to you, point blank. I can't be so sure though. He used to initiate footsies, wink, and he often makes sexual references, which I no longer think are by accident. Now, he hardly looks at me. He has normal conversations with everyone else, but he barely speaks to me at all, and when he does, the conversation is awkward and usually ends in him calling me a dick. (I don't think he says so menacingly though.)
    Anyways, I can't tell if it's because he's trying to make me jealous, if he just doesn't like me anymore, or if he never liked me at all that way and I'm just reading too much into things.
    What do you guys think? Does he like me or not?
    I need a hell of a lot of advice, and if you could help me it would be greatly appreciated. Thanks guys :icon_wink
     
    #1 conflictedmetro, Nov 26, 2015
    Last edited: Nov 26, 2015
  2. PotatoPotato

    PotatoPotato
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    Simular situation here - But in my case things turned back normal. - He winks at me sometimes when something funny comes up - Wich he doesn't do to others. He has a girlfriend about a year ago and things turned back normal a few months before that ended. But honestly i am stuck - I have a huge crush on him, I see a good chance looking at the signs he's bi. I am 100% sure he has no girlfriend. He never even talks about girls... Boys at the other hand though, but not really in a loving fashion.

    So to get is clear - I see a 50/50 chance hes bi. - I have a crush on him (for over 2 years now) - He is one of my best friends - I have a huge crush on him - He doesn't know i am gay. So to quote the conflictedmetro above here:
     
    #2 PotatoPotato, Nov 26, 2015
  3. conflictedmetro

    conflictedmetro
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    I forgot to say...he also asked me if I was gay. Straight up, with a completely serious expression. I'd usually take it as a joke, but this time, there was no humorous precursor to his random inquiry. The question seemed serious, but nonexpectant, like he wanted to know but didn't think I'd tell him. Which I would have, if we had been in a different setting and he was potentially more direct with his "signals."
    When he asked, I said nothing...absolutely nothing. It was little after that when he stopped flirting...
    I feel like things would have been easier if I had said yes....I'm such an idiot... :bang:
     
    #3 conflictedmetro, Nov 27, 2015
  4. PotatoPotato

    PotatoPotato
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    I am unsure (as i am unexperienced with these situations myself) (I highly advice you not to do what i say just to make sure.) but in that case he might be gay and dissapointed you wasn't/stopped doing what he did because you "Aren't" gay
    Though keep in mind that would be a best case scenario.
    -And don't fully trust my answer, i am new on the forum and inexperienced in these situations, just trying to help-
     
    #4 PotatoPotato, Nov 30, 2015
  5. ANerdWhoCares

    ANerdWhoCares
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    This changes everything about what I was going to say to help. I've been in this scenario and had the BAD outcome happen, and it all happened because I didn't tell him how I felt. Now I may never know what could've been. Don't make my mistake, answer his question about you being gay as honestly and comfortably as possible. This situation sounds like the opposite to mine, so it'll likely have the opposite outcome too. :slight_smile:
    (Ordinarily, I'd give a personal story to make you feel more confident, but I'd rather keep mine to myself this time if it's all the same to you.)
     
    #5 ANerdWhoCares, Nov 30, 2015
    Last edited: Nov 30, 2015
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