Coping with being closeted

Hi, welcome to EC!

I'm really sorry to hear that you're in an unsafe homophobic environment, but what do you mean by that; Family? Friends? Society? All 3? To my knowledge, Georgia (assuming by "Atlanta area," you mean Georgia...) is kind of a crappy place for a gay teen to be, but that doesn't make things impossible! Your idea to wait until college is probably not a bad one, considering your circumstances, but I do know some methods of coping with the closet. The first is right in front of you, right now; Empty Closets. I alone have dedicated all my time on this site to helping others, and there are hundreds of others on this site that will do the same. All you have to do is ask.

Second, help another. If you spend some of your time here on EC as an ally to someone else,mane help them with their problems, it's a real confidence and motivational booster. I know it's worked for me.

And thirdly, have a plan. Once your're ready to leave for college, know a good place to go. Some places are more tolerant than others, do your homework and research about where LGBT groups are accepted and supported before you head off to start a new life. College is a great place to be yourself without worrying about what others think of you, so don't go to a place that restricts that freedom.

Hang in there! It'll get better! I'll send you a friend request in case you need someone to talk to.

 

Hi there! I'm living in an environment which is homophobic too. It can be difficult. That's one of the reasons I'm still in the closet too. Though it's been atleast 10 years since I've come to terms with my sexuality, I've still yet to come out to my Parents and Friends about it.

For me it was helpful that my parents are really really supportive of everything. They loved me all my life and are like my friends really. I'm still in the closet because my sexuality is a total different thing to me. I don't let the fact that I can't come out bother me. Probably I got used to being in the closet. I dunno.

I like to think I'm saving myself for someone special out there. So being in the closet makes it even more special. I know it's silly to think that, but it works for me.

I agree with what ANerdWhoCares said. This community is awesome to find people to talk to and to get support. I wish I found it earlier so that I could be more confident. Maybe I would've found a way to come out by now. But that doesn't bother me too much. I know I'll come out soon.

I'm sure you'll be fine. This community really tends to cheer me up. I'm sure it'll do the same for you.

 

It is and can be extremely lonely and depressing. I convinced my parents to send me to therapy for depression and anxiety which I had both, but I feel like it stemmed from holding my secret of being gay too long.. So once I got to my first therapist I told her about and it helped a little bit.. Talking to your brother when you get down or lonely is crucial because it will help you relieve some of the emotions you may be feeling and its not good to keep those feeling and emotions bottled up because they are destructive to your mind. Hang in there and like I said talk to your brother and keep talking to us on here, this place has literally SAVED me, I come here now just to read and it keep me hopeful that I can fully come out safely one day))

 

I agree with everyone who's already posted. It is smart to wait until you are sure you can be safe and I'm so sorry that you have to deal with other people's homophobia. I'm also closeted and I've only told my parents and a few friends so I know how frustrating it is.

It's why I joined this website, actually. I wanted to talk to other LGBT+ people without the fear of others finding out. Using websites like this, talking to a counsellor about it or even just writing about it may help since it always feels good to just articulate your thoughts out loud. I also agree that once you feel it's safe, try and find a support network and make friends with other gay people.

Until then, best of luck and feel free to post again if you need anything else. (*hug*)

 

Like ANerdWhoCares said, one good way is posting on EC. Whether it's in the Fun And Games forum, Help forum, or just messaging people, posting on this website can really help. I know it helped me, especially when I needed it most. Just remember, I'm always up for a chat and I always try to message people back as soon as I can (*hug*) There are also plenty of other people who you can talk to as well. We are even doing a Christmas Matchmaking thingy-majig! I've never done it myself, but I bet it's really helpful for meeting new people.