very complicated situation needs major help

I would suggest bringing up marriage again. If you're this uncomfortable with everyday romantic gestures, I don't think it's good to have this day looming in your future. The fact that you have marriage already in mind means that you aren't moving slow. It's not taking it one day at a time. Don't let yourself be rushed into anything.

She seems fine? Is she fine? Have you asked her if she's nervous or if she's having any problems? Maybe she's secretly anxious as well.

Oh, and welcome to EC!

 

Firstly, welcome to EC!
Secondly, I wouldn't advise rushing into anything. Don't make plans for marriage yet, because even though you've known each other so long, this relationship is a new development and it'll take some time to get used to it. Enjoy the present, and the beginning of the relationship, before focusing on the future. If you keep taking it one day at a time, I'm pretty sure you'll adjust, but because this is so new and so sudden, it's normal to feel weird about such a major change.

 

It seems to me like you are jumping from being good friends and roomates to life partners in a big hurry! Maybe you need to actually date first? I would slow down on the marriage plans and just go out and enjoy eachothers company. See how it goes!

 

I had a brief relationship with someone I had been friends with for many years, and who had been in a long therm relationship up until that point. Yes, I was in love for all those years but kept quiet and just waited. Then they broke up and he came to me. I had been thinking of him for all those years, hoping he's be mine, but once I got with him it just didn't feel right. I left him after about one month. We drifted apart as friends and didn't have any contact for years and then made up. Still great friends to this day. Sometimes friends are meant to be just friends but maybe it can work for some people too. Try to relax about the whole thing and feel deep down inside you what you REALLY want out of this. You might very well have won the lottery - who knows?

 

Woah, woah, woah, have you two even DATED yet?! It's a little early to be planning marriage. Even if you guys have known each other for ten years this is an ENTIRELY new relationship. Wallflower is right, sometimes friends are supposed to be just friends, but you'll have a little trouble changing your mind if it doesn't work out when your married. You need to slow down and get the full dating experience first, with her if you want.

As for getting together with a friend, na, I've never had that problem. It would feel a little awkward for me, but I'm an awkward person, so...

 

In one night, my BEST FRIEND in the entire world of six years and I ended up in a relationship. Well, we confirmed it the next morning. The day before, we were just friends, hadn't spoken about dating or realized we both liked eachother at all.

She was the one who wanted a relationship with me, and like you, the idea made me sick for a few days after I said yes. We'd never done anything remotely close to a relationship or dating before that. I was afraid I'd mess it up, too.

Yeah, and I definitely felt weird about it as well. This is all still recent to me, so feel free to PM me if you ever need to talk or vent about it.

We've been dating for about three months and we both adjusted pretty well :]
When you're around someone you like so much it becomes easier.

I guess the only problem I'm having with it right now is being in relationship limbo... You're best friends, but if you date eachother you're more than that and you *need* to treat it so. I'm still working on that one.

I hope this works out for you!

 

It's against the rules to post it in a public area
And I can't PM you either.
Sorry... this kind of stinks :/

You should try applying to become a full member.

 

Sure anything to help you out

Well first, I blamed my attraction on the fact that she was a girl. I thought maybe I just found her cute or something because I'm gay.
After I ditched that idea, I thought we were just really close friends and that's why I was confused. It was soo hard to accept that I liked her, because she's so perfect I thought I had no chance at all.

But she had been dropping hints at me for awhile that she liked me... Once I started to realize I liked her more and more it got scary. I remember once we were in my basement looking at some old picture book and she moved down the couch next to me and practically sat on my lap and I sat there dumbfounded for about a minute, thinking about how badly I wanted to kiss her.
I should have known she was trying to put the moves on me lol! Still, I was still too freaked out to realize it.

It was really hard when we first started dating because we'd only spoken about it when we were high or online. I remember the first time I was alone with her I was seriously like, "Oh my god what now?" We were watching Austin Powers and it was practically the end of the movie before I finally grabbed her hand, haha.

So yes, I was very scared. Partly because it was a new relationship, actually.. My FIRST relationship, but mostly because she's my best friend and I was worried that I'd mess that up.

It took us about a month to even kiss eachother. But that's just it- you need time to ease into it. When we first decided to date if she suddenly tried to make out with me I'm pretty sure I would have fled the room or told her we shouldn't date.

It's normal to be nervous and scared.. especially about dating your best friend.
But if it works out, the result is amazing. Because we were so close before, there's nobody I trust more or feel more comfortable with.

 

If you're comfortable saying, how old are you guys?
I think you might be feeling a little of both. Recently all of the fear I had went away. I eventually had to trust my friend/girlfriend and go with the flow. I honestly think that if we ever didn't work out, we'd still be best friends.

If you feel that way about this girl... it's normal to worry but don't let it stop you! Just take things slow and try to ease into it :]

Anyway... When and what.. That's a hard question. There have been "instances" when I had a little bit of a crush on her, and I remember having a crush on her in jr. high, but I guess I actually started to like her-like her when school started this year.

As we got older and got closer, I just started to see her that way.. which scared me. First, I thought she would never be into me. But her also being gay was a problem because I felt like I didn't have any excuses left

The way she acted towards me definitely made a difference..(because she liked me) or I should say, it made me realize it. I do think I've always liked her though, and I've had a few people tell me they could tell I did.

She told me she dropped so many hints that she liked me
I guess an example.. We went on this haunted trail right that had some hanuted house after the forest/hay ride portion. We were stumbling through this house and she was scared shitless and said, "I don't mean to creep you out but will you hold my hand?" or something like that. Just feeling that and being close to her, I guess, definitely made me see it more.

Also whenever I was alone with her. It just started to become really apparent at the beginning of the year.

 

That's very possible, I did something similar. I never thought that dating my friend was an option because I always ruled it out with someodd excuse.

Do you think you're going to pursue this?

 

I freaked out a little bit too.

Even though I so badly wanted to crawl back in my shell and say no, I said yes and I've never regretted that. I'm so glad I gave it a chance, because I'm so happy right now and I almost let it pass me by.