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My Parents are ruining my life!

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by justinishere, Jan 25, 2009.

  1. justinishere

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    Well the title basically says it all. Lately my parents have really been smothering me and watching every little thing I do lately. We just moved to where I am living 2 and a half months ago and lately haven't been getting any freedom. Where I used to live I used to be really independent. Going to the mall with friends and by myself, walking to places by myself etc. But since we moved I can't go anywhere by myself! It is seriously driving me crazy. I would like to get out to meet some new friends since I don't have any at the moment but with my parents plus my little sister around you can imagine how hard it is to do so. I even met some people at school but we aren't that close. So my mom suggests that I invite them over to my house which is probably another way just to monitor me some more.

    What should I do?? I really needs some time for myself ALONE but even hints that I drop don't seem to be taking effect. Even when I ask can you drop me off at this place they decide they need to come too... :help:
     
  2. justinishere

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    I guess I forgot to ask what should I do???:help:
     
  3. wallflower

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    What do you think is the reason for this change in their treatment of you? Have you moved to an area where they need to worry more about you being out and about or are they afraid that you'll be meeting the wrong crowd? I guess parents always worry about their teens, wondering if they do drugs or get mixed up in bad things... Could it be that, or has it to do with lack of trust? If they used to trust you and don't now, how come?

    I think you need to sit down and talk to them about this. If you bring the subject up in a mature way and tell them that you really need to form some sort of social life at this new place, they might see this in a mature light too instead of meeting you with a forbidding attitude.
     
  4. musican

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    I'm going to try and channel Lex:

    Can you talk to you parents about feeling smothered?
    If you can, I suggest that you do and make sure that you talk to them as respectfully as you can, complaining and yelling at them won't help because they'll probably just treat you like a kid. You could try asking them why they're giving you less space lately and respectfully ask for some more independence. They may not agree that you deserve more space and sadly, you won't be able to do much about it except be responsible and wait until they realize that you are responsible enough for more independence.

    Good luck!
     
  5. SAGUY84

    SAGUY84 Guest

    Rebel!

    Not the real rebel, just make them think your rebelling.

    Leave an empty cigarette packet somewhere, alcohol bottles. Then when they confront you, tell them your not actually doing any of that stuff, but you just needed to get their attention to let them know you want your freedom back that you had at the old house :wink:
     
  6. Fiorino

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    WHOA that could backfire big time.
    Not a good idea.
     
  7. SAGUY84

    SAGUY84 Guest

    Its a great idea if he's telling the full story, and that nothing has changed besides moving house. Why would he have freedom at one house, and not the other.

    Show them how bad things 'could be', then they'll be grateful they have a kid that just wants to hang with his friends (and make new ones)
     
  8. HeronsStorm

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    Err, that STILL might end badly.

    The safest option I believe would be to, of course, talk to the parents directly. You're parents are just worrying about your safety most likely, you ARE their baby boy (no matter how much you deny it and no matter how old you get ;P. Parents are like that). When you're talking to them, try to avoid things like 'you'.

    For example, "I've been feeling like I'm being smothered lately" would go better than "You've been smothering me." Using 'you' can sound accusative, and when you use "I" and refer to yourself, it gives your parents breathing room to think it out because they don't have to defend themselves.

    Hope that helps. (*hug*)