Hi everyone! I know this topic has probably been covered but I couldn't find advise unique to my situation. So to give you some background to myself, I am a 28 year old gay guy. I am out to a few family members and a few friends. Thing is, I am very reserved and I don't have a large group of friends. In fact last year I was depressed as I felt like I had no friends - the ones I was making were pretentious and high maintenance and that isn't the type of person I want to be. So one of my resolutions was to make at least 5 friends this year. I started studying part time and have met some really cool people so far. One in particular is a guy I started chatting to in my class - we met at a vending machine and started chatting and hanging out in class. His a really cool guy, in fact I have found myself attracted to him - not just physically but his personality too. But I don't want to jump the gun or assume the attraction is mutual and after all I still want to be his friend. We have alot in common - similar career goals, even desire to go to the same city after studies. Either way, I am so comfortable with him and we even hangout after class and he walks me halfway to the bustop or I walk him halfway to his car. I am not trying to make it sound romantic, I guess friends do that too With that said, we were chatting and he asked me if I have a girlfriend and I said "No. I last dated in 2014 and then he in turn also he said he last dated in 2013. Anyhow...I don't want to ruin a friendship that makes me happy but I am worried that if I tell him that I am gay, things might change and maybe he wont be comfortable hanging with me. But at the same time he might feel like I am been conniving and maybe think that my intentions were wrong if I tell him too late. We have only been friends for a few weeks now, but I feel like I should set the record straight that I am gay and hope that he is comfortable with that and that we can still hangout. Even if we just stay friends and he doesn't feel any attraction to me I will be fine with that. I just find myself really caring about him. I want to know if he got home safe, if he had a good day, if his in good health etc. But we only see each other in class 2/3 times a week. Any advise on if its a good time will be really appreciated. Thanks:smilewave
I had a similar situation happen to me. A male straight friend of mine asked me if I had a girlfriend and I said no. A month or so went by and the subject came up again. I didn't know him all that long but we had developed a really good friendship. I was scared that it would ruin our friendship if I told him the truth, but felt he should know. He was totally cool with it and we still have a really close relationship. It's always a gamble to come out to someone- you can never really know what their reaction will be- but if your friendship is how you say it is, he'll understand why you didn't tell him off the bat. So I guess what I am saying is that you can hope that the conversation comes up again and then set the record straight, or if you feel comfortable enough just let him know. True friends will understand.
