So a few months ago, I realised that I was gay and I came to term with it quite quickly. This was just before I started university so I was excited about the prospect that I could explore who I was as a person and be open about my sexuality with people who wouldn't judge me. The first few days were horrible. I wasn't making friends with my housemates and I was feeling really isolated and alone. I joined the LGBT society hoping that I would make friends there but that didn't work out. Now, I've made good friends with people, one of which I'm moving in with come September and I'm open about my sexuality with anyone who asks. Recently though, I've just re-connected with my friends who I haven't seen or spoken to since June of last year. Now that I know I'm gay, I want to be open with my friends and come out to them. However, the thought of coming out to my close friends, let alone my parents, fills me with fear. This is mainly because I just don't know how they'll react. I've been friends with some of them since I was 3 years old so I'm scared of losing my friends if they react badly. I've read many people's stories on EC and I've watched lots of videos on YouTube so I'm hopeful that one day I'll be out and open. I'm actually seeing them this weekend so that would be a good opportunity I guess but I'll probably just not say anything and I'll end up beating myself up afterwards. Anyways, thanks for reading and any advice or helpful words would be nice...
Its can be quite difficult re-connecting with your old school friends Particularly as you have grown up with them with a different mindset But maybe you need to just tackle things on a one by one basis and when the time seems right for you
Hey bingostring, thanks for replying. I was actually thinking of doing it one by one and besides, I was only really planning on telling 2 of my friends as I'm closer to them and they'd be the ones least likely to react badly. I was actually talking to them on Skype yesterday and I just felt really down and that I wasn't being myself. This secret is slowly eating away at me and its hard when they're all talking about girls and relationship stuff and I don't know what to say in those situations...
Bee12, I know how you feel being alone and scared. My situation is a little different, well maybe a lot different. I am also married to a woman. However, I told two of my closest friends that I have been friends with since the 2nd grade. I was scared to death, to tell them but I did it. At first there was a silence that after I told them, then one said ok and this changes our friendship how. They both told my that they support me in my coming out as gay. The reason I told them first was so I can have a support system when I tell the wife I'm gay. Just know one thing you are not alone in this, there are many people going through the same thing as you. Me being one of them. Keep your head held high, be who you are not what other think you should be. If they can not accept who you really are, then they may not have really been you friend.
Hey For him, thank you for your kind words. I have just sent a text message to one of my friends saying I want to talk later and now I'm gonna be on edge all day until then... Oh well! I'll post again here later saying it went.
It is only going to get better sweety! We live in a world where people have become more accepting. I know nothing about these friends of yours but I would not imagine that their reactions are going to be bad. Are they ultra conservative Christians? I would suggest that if you really want to come out to them that you just come to them with sincerity. "Listen I have been struggling with something and I really want to confide in you because I trust you. I'm gay."
Woooow... Just told my friend and I feel pretty good! I was chatting for a good few hours and I knew that I had to just say it. I even had my brother for moral support and so I said to him that I was gay (it was easier to say this time around, I don't know why) and he reacted the way I hoped he would. He said that it was fine and that it changes nothing and he said he was really happy for me! So that's one friend down, one to go and I never thought that I'd be able to actually do it. Thanks to everyone for all the kind words! You're the best! (!)(*hug*)(&&&)
