Hello. I have found out about being androgyne for a few weeks. I will continue to keep this to myself a while, but I am afraid of what people will think. I am thinking of it right now. It's even worse when I have social anxiety disorder, when I think everyone judges me 24/7. I was in the mental health sector before realizing I was not female, but thinking about coming out scares me. I feel so enjoyable wearing unisex clothing, more masculine clothing, looking androgynous, people calling me by an androgynous nickname I haven't decided yet. I feel happy thinking about it, but I'm so scared about people seeing me as me because I'm afraid they'll say "oh, you're a girl, but you don't look female" but I'm not a female, that's why dumb nut. It's a thought that terrifies me. I am really scared. Being cisgender female before was hard due to female discrimination, but now it's a whole other type of discrimination and I'm scared of it. I can picture myself wearing genderless clothes or looking more masculine, but I love my feminine side too, just not in the ways other express it. Anyways, how does one get over the "what ifs" of coming out about being "different" from "normal"? I'm not going to come out until I am sure, but for now, I will stick to this me. Thanks for your help .
I don't know if this helps, but personally, I think you should be proud of being different. Honestly the most attractive gender neutral trait/characteristic is noted to be that of confidence. If you're going to go through with this, it will help to take it on full stride. You can experiment some before hand, since it's a big step— but once you've decided, it really helps if you're confident with your choice. For me, I've always been noted to be different. And I was really self conscious about that once upon a time. But then I developed my own style and friend groups and activities that I was comfortable with. I'm pretty sure most of the people who know me now might suspect I'm somewhere on the queer spectrum. But no one really asks or talks about it, and I think it's because they know that I'm my own person, and that their opinions don't apply to me. As for your social anxiety? It helps to have friends. And I mean really, really good friends. The kind who like you more than you like yourself. Not always easy to find, of course, but those are real gems. If you can't find friends like that, it might be a good idea to become friends with yourself. Aka get to know yourself, your interests, what you're good at, what you like, etc. Those things can improve self esteem. Sometimes it takes a little distancing from society to build confidence. I hope this helps.
Hey I'm sorry your feeling this way I want you to know If you need anything I'll be more than happy to help Tske a deep breath try to relax you don't have to tell no one your secret until your ready Kf it's causing so much anxiety that's a good sign that shows that your strong but anxious I was anxious when I come out but your family and friends should accept you cuz your stilclthe child they had and love! Good luck
