Hey EC, For those of who you who read my other thread about my mom, thanks for all the comments and advice. It has really been helpful knowing that there are people who at least try to understand and give me comfort when I need it most. This whole past week has been so stressful, and I just really appreciate being able to get onto EC and vent, talk, and let my emotions flow through me as words onto a page. I do believe that I am making myself sick by keeping so muuch inside me, but ever since I joined EC I feel better about myself, knowing that I am not alone. Anyhow, this is how my valentines day went down yesterday.. I have been sick for about four days now (the doctors think that I have an ulcer, or liver problems, I'll find out next week) and my ex girlfriend (the one from my other post) asked if she could come over, and I naturally told her I didnt feel good, but my wonderful mother insisted..So last night my ex walks into my room and crawls into bed with me. I was pissed! So I told my mom that since she invited her over she needed to come talk to her because I didnt feel good. A couple of hours go by, and I announce that I am off to bed, and my wonderful mother insist that my ex spend the night at our house!!! Wtf? I clearly didnt want her there in the first place. My mom knew I was pissed, but even so, she also asked her to stay for dinner today, as in she will be back here, at my house in a couple of hours. I am so sick of my mom pushing people on me, its not gonna happen! I just want to come out to my mom, so that this will stop. Yesterday I would have never even thought about coming out to my mom any time soon. But now, Im seriously contemplating it, sooner than later is always better right? I almost came out to my best friend (who is a girl) last night, just because I wanted to cry, and I felt like it was weighing so heavy on my heart to just speak up and tell someone. I really dont think she would mind, Im just scared, naturally. Bur I have told myself that I will tell her (my best friend) before the end of this month, so wish me luck with that. My whole family just expects me to be so freaking perfect. And I am so scared of whats gonna happen after they all know. Im the one my parents depend on, the "smart" one, the responsible one, and Im just so scared. Why do they think I have it so easy? Like my life is just a walk in the park, its far from it. I know that there are people out there who have it so much worse, and I try to remind myself that everytime I feel down. I am a blessed person. To all of you on EC, I want you know to know that my heart goes out to all of you, and all of your situations, and I think about you guys/girls alot. I hope that everything works out for all of us, and I know that it will. We just have to stay positive. I freaking love all of you. Sorry for rambling, and I know this is random. Just needed to write/talk. I listen to this song like non-stop, and it always almost makes me cry I want to paint my face And pretend that I am someone else Sometimes I get so fed up I don't even want to look at myself But people have problems that are worse than mine I don't want you to think I'm complaining all the time And I hate the way you look at me I have to say I wish I could start over [Chorus] I am slowly falling apart I wish you'd take a walk in my shoes for a start You might think it's easy being me You just stand still, look pretty Sometimes I find myself shaking In the middle of the night And then it hits me and I can't Even believe this is my life But people have problems that are worse than mine I don't want you to think I'm complaining all the time And I wish that everyone would go and shut their mouths I'm not strong enough to deal with it
I am sorry to hear about what your mom was doing. That is totally wrong. You are an adult and she should not be interfering with your life like that. I would just tell her that you don't want to see your ex and would appreciate it if she did not invite your ex over to your house.
I think she just feels bad for her, I know my mom is just trying to help. And I love her for trying. Maybe this is just my fault for hiding this from her, she doesnt know why I get so mad. I just cant imagine coming out to her, it drives me crazy!
Even if she feels bad for your ex, she is still your ex and she should respect you enough not to invite her over if it makes you upset. you don't even need to come out to her. I would just say you need some space from her.
I will, in fact I think I will talk to her in a little bit. Because I was really mean to her last night, and I feel like a jerk. :icon_sad:
Wow. I'd hate that too. If I am not in the mood for company, then there is none. Simple as that. One thing my mom does that drives me crazy is waves the "THis is my house not yours" over my head. My whole family pretty much despises me and you've probably experienced similar issues. Lol It's so funny...they were always so into their own business and saying their kids were so great but now looking at it...only two in the family of about 7 kids are actually DOING something with their lives, me being one. The other is close to graduating a college. But if she is forcing your GF on you just reject her. If shes not what you want then make sure she knows. o.o Kinda weird you HAVE a GF but its all good. Its your body, no one elses.
