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Came out to all my friends, yet don't feel ready to come out to family-normal?

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by MayaBee, Mar 8, 2016.

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  1. MayaBee

    MayaBee
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    So I came out to 6 friends, which are all that I planned on telling personally, everybody else in my class and school can find out on their own, but those 6 people I felt like they should get it from me and now I am going to rock that queer life.
    But, even tho I already feel like I've accomplished so much and feel so liberated, I don't feel like I am ready to tell my parents and siblings. I don't fear them reacting negative, but I just can't see myself coming out to them right now, at least for 1-2 more months. AT LEAST.

    Am I the only one who feels/felt like this?
     
    #1 MayaBee, Mar 8, 2016
  2. Lacybi

    Lacybi
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    I came out to seven of my friends and my parents. My friends all were great and my parents said I just needed to settle into my skin. I really need to come out to them again before I can be myself properly but I still don't feel ready (and it's been six months since I came out to them last time). I think it's because they influence you so much and you can't really escape from them. You can ignore 'friends' that take it badly but not your family. Your family have know you your whole life and chances are they'll be there for the rest of your life too whereas friends can come and go. I think coming out to friends but not family is a perfectly normal feeling. Anyway, good luck! xøSeth
     
    #2 Lacybi, Mar 8, 2016
  3. europeanguy

    europeanguy
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    perfectly normal, i came out to all my friends (i have 1 friend...haha so alone) yet i cant stomach doing that to my family. although im planning to tell them this friday, i think ive finally got it. but know that it is perfectly normal
     
    #3 europeanguy, Mar 8, 2016
  4. eMei

    eMei
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    It's totally fine to tell people at your own pace. Coming out is a big move and definitely takes time and care. Congrats on coming out to your friends :grin:
     
    #4 eMei, Mar 8, 2016
  5. treasure1996

    treasure1996
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    Congrats on coming out to your friends! I've recently told one friend.. yesterday actually! First person I've come out too, and I have a couple more friends to go.
    I plan on telling my parents in about 9 months time..

    I'm no where near ready now either! I've decided to write a letter and give it to them before I go away with friends after I finish high school.
    It's perfectly normal to want to wait, parents are the biggest ones we gotta tell!
     
    #5 treasure1996, Mar 8, 2016
  6. Kiran

    Kiran
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    Grats for the coming out.

    Lacybi, I wish I were so optimistic as you. In my case, I can be sure of several friends that will not leave me ever (15 years or so and counting) but I'm not sure about my family. My friends know me much better than my family ever would dream (if they really wanted to).

    My friends know. I'm still playing the girl part for my family but that's reasonable as I'm setting in motion several things that should help my overall condition (depression etc.) and I want to finish postgrad studies without drama or find a new job. Everything is planned. My bi coming out was too accidental. :wink:
     
    #6 Kiran, Mar 8, 2016
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