Hello! I have come out to a few friends and I want to come out to more because I am kinda done with living as a lie and also because it's so lonely so maybe i might be able to connect with someone. I have already written down what i am going to say, I just don't know if I should say it. I am concerned with the potential backlash and rumors but also what if something changes and I date a girl or something (very highly unlikely). Help!
I almost immediately went to Facebook after coming out to my Mom (single parent household) to publicly come out to the numerous remaining individuals who hadn't already been told. You need to understand that there will always be people to talk crap about you. I am more active in my community in advocating for LGBTQ rights and that has caused me to amass a bad reputation with my town's conservative bloque. What's important is that you understand that their opinions don't matter. A circle of friends who will support you also helps. Good luck!
In my own experience, I have decided not to come out on facebook, just because 1) It's better to tell people in person or over the phone, since its more personal 2) Once it's on social media, everyone knows. You can't take it back later, even if you delete your original post. My rule for fb is, only post if you don't mind anyone in the world finding out. Granted I see the appeal of posting on fb, since you get the whole process over with quickly, but due to the reasons above I can't see how its a good idea for most people.
I guess it depends on how much you use Facebook and who you have on it. I remember a classmate came out over a status when we were 16ish, which was effective. But now there'd be no point for me, I'm at university and it would just be providing pointless gossip for people I went to school with who don't know me anymore. I haven't written a status for years so for me to write one out of the blue would be very weird, and I don't see how its relevant to any of those people! I do have my interested in as "men and women", and I can see myself using it to hint at my orientation by showing that I'm going to pride events/joining lgbt Facebook groups etc. maybe even "in a relationship with _____" being a girl if I ever get to that!
Hey, I have struggled with the same thing recently. Part of me, like you, says I want to get the whole thing done with and just tell everyone - the positive to this is you don't have to constantly tell people "I'm gay" when they ask about a girlfriend or anything. However, I decided I am not going to make it public because I have people on Facebook I really don't talk to that much anymore. I feel they don't need to know my business and I also hate attention on myself - so I feel making a status would cause a lot of unwanted attention. I concluded that I will be open about it from here on out - as in, I will not hide it anymore. If someone asks, I will tell the person. If I ever get in a relationship, I will post it on Facebook with no worries. But making a coming out statement public is just not in my best interests. It all depends on what YOU want. You will know what is best. As others said, if you want to do something more subtle, you can like pages on Facebook for LGBT rights or even like pages of gay celebrities. You definitely don't have to hide yourself anymore.
Honestly, it's different for everyone. If you really feel ready and are prepared for what could happen, it might be worth it for you to do. BUT ONLY IF YOU'RE EMOTIONALLY AND PHYSICALLY READY. If you aren't ready to do battle with a homophobe or lose a friend or two over this, I would likely advise against it. I will say, for myself, the day I came out on Facebook was literally one of the greatest days of my life. The amount of love was overwhelming and from that day forward I was officially done with the pretense of being straight. I am so much happier and freer as a result. My mental health has improved 5-fold. No I'm not cured of everything, but my general demeanor is just happier. I'm not worried about who finds out. If someone finds out, who cares? Everyone already knows, and it's no secret.
